I’ve been fine with my OCD for years now after intensive out patient in middle school. I’m very aware of my ocd and anxiety but there’s this one thing that i’m realizing might be an obsession and I figured i’d ask if anybody else could weigh in or relate. My on and off boyfriend/bestfriend is the closest and most positive person in my life but there’s complications and i’m constantly worried about being interesting or coming up with a real conversation or making us do something because i’m obsessively worried that if we don’t know what to talk about or do we will become stuck and stagnant and meet some terrible end between us. i constantly pressure myself to lead us to excitement always and deep conversations and to just be perfect or something and i’ve broken down when we hang out because i’m so crushed under the pressure when neither of us know what to say or do. it feels like a tragedy bc it makes me think we won’t work or are secretly bad for eachothers lives idk i’m writing so much bc i’m anxious ahhhhhhh hahaha

Hi There! If at any point I overstep I apologize. Has it always been like this , like does he help to figure out what to do it talk about? I was in a relationship not long ago that was close to the same way for me , siting and over obsessing and analyzing eveything we did or didn’t do and arranging our future together and how every action changed that future in my head. I always wanted to get out and do things but really could not because we were in such a small town with not much to do. Nothing was close enough and we always blamed the weather or the time of day or any other thing we could think of , we watched months pass by but we learned to love just being in eachothers company , almost like when we first met , did not matter what we did or when we did it or even if we did nothing we just lived together in our space. You mentioned being on and off with your Boyfriend/Best friend , Was that more on him or does that fall more on you (. Not Saying Who Is to blame) but maybe you 2 should talk out your problems more even if they feel (For Lack Of A Better Word) stupid , i’ve been there , talking always seemed to help both of us. Sorry i’m all over the place but this guy sounds like he has been good for you , at least good enough to keep around even past the on and off times. If you don’t want to lose him , don’t. Also do not be afraid to tell him what you need , it could be space/time , just having him around , or even getting back together even though things might be rocky ( If You Go With That Make Sure You Are Both Understanding That It Could End/Lead To Another Break Just Based On A Bad Day OR Something Of The Sorts ) Again I’m sorry for hopping around so much , I’m going to end this by saying , If this guy means a lot to you and is good for you , do not let him go. I hope the absolute best for you , If he cares about you he will stick around , but , don’t ever silence your voice or mind. You opened up on this app , you should be open to him ( Obviously Dont Know If You Have Or Not) . One last thing , Just try to be with him when you are with him no matter what you guys are doing. We never know how much time we have left with anyone in our live so make the most of it while you have it , I can tell you from personal experience that it’s a lot of work to keep relationships going sometimes especially with all these thoughts , anxiety , and ocd hopping around all the time but if someone is willing to stick with you though that do not let them go. (Sorry Again My Mind Is A Jumbled Mess And I Just Want To Help If I Can LOL)