- Date posted
- 5y
- Date posted
- 5y
I'm sorry you're going through this friend :(
- Date posted
- 5y
Yeah it sucks. I wish to be myself and free again but for that to happen i have to forget this ever happens which seems Impossible
- Date posted
- 5y
I'm the same. I started to keep a journal, though, and it's helping me a lot to keep track of my thoughts. I never go in depth about my ocd, but I just write how I feel, my dreams, poems that I like, photos I have, etc. I try to romantize everything, writing scenarios and all. It's such a mood, it reminds me of a Lana Del Rey song. I really recommend doing this.
- Date posted
- 5y
That was me when my hocd was very bad, constant instructive thoughts and anxiety, all day from the moment I woke up to the time I slept I couldn’t watch shows without thinking I have a crush on the girl and I would ask my self does that boy still look cute to you. I never had this app when I was in the worst stage but I had a support group online. The best thing to do is to try and start to do thinks that cause you anxiety. But slowly and the ones that don’t cause as much anxiety and hopefully it will get better but I would 100% recommend going to therapy I never went but I feel like I wish I did because even though I’m better I feel like there’s a chance it will come back because it always happens, I’ll go through a few years of being pretty much anxiety free and then it comes rushing back. Like a year before all this I had one instructive thoughts about a girl and then never again and then boom everyday for 3 months.
- Date posted
- 5y
I am going to therapy a couple of years and it has definitely helped me. My major disorder is anxiety. Depersonalisation and hocd came as sideeffects. For me emotional focused therapy helped the most, cause I had so much trouble to process and even feel feelings that were going on inside of me when I had trigger situations. I can strongly recommend that for those who feel numb, depersonalized or overwhelmed by anxiety and stress to such degree that you almost not feel anything else.
- Date posted
- 5y
Hey do you have Snapchat
- Date posted
- 5y
Hey. I know how you feel. I have the same problems that I know how it felt doing sth before I had hoch and no while doing it, it feels so distanced and non personal. I get into a conflict between my memories + former feeling and now where I usually react anxious. And I start ruminating and it gets worse and I feel like I always trap myself and ruin my evening. The only thing that helps is crying and after crying I feel more integrated and can enjoy a movie to some stage until it slowly starts again with ruminating, getting anxious etc.
Related posts
- Date posted
- 21w
Everyday I wake up, all my mind makes me think of is the stuff I’ve done in the past, like all day I’m in a constant cycle of judging who I used to be and it hurts so so much. I wish I never thought to do those things, I wish I had been more mature than how I was before, it’s really lowering my self worth and I don’t think I’ve ever felt this miserable before, like last summer was the worst because I was dealing with this shit, I about almost ended my life over it, and I thought it would get better, which it did, but it didn’t last but for a while. As soon as it became 2025 I was going through it again, having constant cycles of “I’m a good person” to “I’m the worst person imaginable” and I’m so sick of it because I just want to feel like the good person l like to imagine myself to be, but I can’t because of shit I did in the past that I obsess over. I’ve cried and screamed so much over it and it seems like it will never leave me.
- Date posted
- 20w
some days I wake up with so much dread and guilt. It makes it so hard to keep going. I open my eyes and I’m hit with a wave of nausea and terror. I feel ashamed of my compulsions and my OCD. I feel like a monster for my checking compulsions. For momentarily sexualizing things that shouldn’t be sexualized out of anxiety. I’m ashamed of a lot that I give into because of anxiety. Confessing things that are meaningless to my boyfriend. I feel so awful and unworthy of existing and of love. I feel hopeless I don’t want to keep pushing, the more I push the more meta my OCD becomes and the more guilt I feel for this mental illness. The more confusing it becomes to do ERP. If compulsions are a choice, they feel like life or death and it’s driving me insane, I beat myself up so badly over them I’m scared of compulsions, I’m scared of thoughts, I’m scared to be awake, I’m even scared of sleeping because my intrusions and compulsions haunt me there too. I spend my dreams trying to explain or justify my OCD and compulsions to people. I’m exhausted, I want this to stop so badly. My severe OCD isn’t feeling any less severe and it’s been months. I don’t want to keep questioning my every move but I’m so hyperaware of everything I do. I’m so tired. Some days I don’t even have tears to cry with. I’m just so full of despair and shame
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- Date posted
- 19w
I don’t know what I can do. I guess this is more of a depression thing than OCD but who knows. I have been battling this ongoing war within myself for years now and it’s been affecting my academic performance. situation of mine right now: I haven’t done a lot of work for my classes this month and I feel like I’m going to fail the semester again. I don’t know what it is but I can never seem to begin any work. I know I am capable but why can’t I get myself to start? why has this been going on for so long? I don’t understand. I have a history of good grades back in high school before I turned 17. I don’t even know how to describe it. it’s like I’ve been paralyzed and cannot do any work. but I can somehow do offside tasks like pinterest boards or random youtube videos. if I get rid of those, what do I do? I end up sleeping. because I’m tired. I have a low vitamin D deficiency & have been trying to get energy. I’m at a loss. I also bought unnecessary stuff on sunday when I went out with my family. I bought some things for the kids and I ended up buying myself a dress and a few accessories. now I have to work extra to gain that money back doing uber eats because I need it asap. it’s like I don’t want to work, for now. my coworkers who are around my age don’t work as much & I think to myself, “wow, they must be getting in the work done” meanwhile I’m working 3 days a week (which isn’t much) and attending school. I feel like if I change my schedule again, I’ll ruin it for the rest of my driver coworkers. I’m in a lead position at work so having to put on a mask is quite tiring. there’s so much I want to say that I don’t think it will fit in this post. I have booked a mental health session with a school counselor. all I want at the moment is to have my own place and be in a better mental state to take care of my cats. they mean a lot to me but this stupid ass undiagnosed mental issue is getting in the way. sorry for the long rant. I am tired.
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