How do I get past the sadness and regret?

(22F) Broke up with my ex. Didn’t know what ROCD was at the time. He has moved on with someone new. The depression and regret has gotten really bad as of lately, and I don’t know what to do. I’m so tired. I kind of want to be single forever, though my heart yearns for connection. I’ve always wanted to be a mom and parent with someone I love one day. It’s not worth it if my mind is this way. I’m working with a NOCD therapist soon. If someone has a story similar I would love to hear, I’m really struggling. Thank you so much.

Relationship OCD

Tulips4thesoul

Date posted: 36w

You're so young. I'm almost 36 and my OCD has great effected my relationships and I only got my diagnosis a couple of months ago. I stayed with my first relationship for 13 years and I really regret staying for as long as I did. And my last relationship I just got out of, I would ruminate on his past relationships and that ultimately lead to us breaking up. Regardless of if you stay or leave, you could have regrets, like I did for staying. You still have so much life to live, move on and find someone new, there are so many people out there who will be great partners for you. Give it some time if this break up was recent. Work on yourself so you can be the best you before getting into a relationship, especially if you want to be a parent. Best of luck to you. Relationships are tough.

Elizabeth010101

Date posted: 36w

@Tulips4thesoul Thank you so much. The depression has gotten really bad, and I appreciate any encouragement for the future. Seeing him in friend groups doesn’t help - I can’t find anything bad about him and just miss my best friend. I don’t know what to do it’s hard to keep this up. Do you have any advice of how to move on? Break up was January 2024, he got a girlfriend, they broke up, we started being romantic again but OCD was in the way, though I was happy, then he got a new girlfriend. Found out about ROCD. Thank you again.

Tulips4thesoul

Date posted: 36w

@Elizabeth010101 Well, you just kind of do move on. Time passes and you just keep living your life 🤷🏼‍♀️ you can take intentional steps to distract yourself, which is helpful. If this guy is in your friend group, make new friends. Find new hobbies. Travel. Move somewhere new. Get a new job. Go to school. You have so many options. I moved to a new state with my ex, so I'm now taking the steps to sell the house i bough here and move to a diff state and have a fresh start. Moving on looks different for everyone and means something different for everyone. But, I think you're already doing it. 🤗

User type: Therapist

Date posted: 36w

I am so glad that you are seeking therapy. Please keep in mind that OCD does not have to be in the drivers seat!!

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