Existential ocd help please.

I’m really sorry your going through that. OCD is truly the worst. I am absolutely not an expert on this so I’m sorry if this doesn’t help. I was struggling with this a little bit a couple of months ago while in a deep depression. What helped me is someone saying that I just had to accept the not knowing and keep living. I could die tomorrow, but it’s not about when it will end or what happens after. It’s about making the most of the time we have in the present moment. No one truly knows 100% what happens after we die. It can feel scary, but try your best to let it go and focus on the moment. Making connections and being able to feel life’s moments is what it’s all about. It’s what gives life meaning.

I understand where you're coming from and I've been in the same dark mind state you're currently going through. On the OCD side of things, if you're getting caught in a loop with these thoughts and feel so affected by them, I would certainly suggest speaking to a professional OCD specialist if that's possible. What you would want to practice is not taking these thoughts and beliefs as entirely black/white, true/false. You want to respond to them with "maybe, maybe not," even if it feels like they're true. Life is meaningless..."maybe, maybe not." None of this matters..."maybe, maybe not." None of this makes sense..."maybe, maybe not." Approaches like ERP (exposure response prevention) would help you learn that you can sit with the uncomfortable feelings these thoughts bring, without having to do anything, and you can handle it. It will come and go on its own. Ultimately, your goal isn't to prove or disprove these thoughts. Your goal isn't even to get RID of these thoughts. Your goal is to life your life DESPITE these thoughts. I won't suggest you do any research into nihilism (because that can VERY easily become a compulsion in the state you're currently in), so you'll have to take my word for it that people often misunderstand it as a philosophy. Nietzsche, the most famous nihilistic philosopher, may have written about the potential "meaninglessness" of everything, but he didn't advocate that life isn't worth living. And I know exactly what you're probably thinking..."ok, but WHY should I do anything if these thoughts are even potentially true?"' When this "why?" pops up, try to remember that an equally valid question is, "why not?"

Hello mandioc, I hear your struggle and you are not alone. I am wondering how connected you are with professional support. ERP treatment is the gold-standard treatment for OCD. You can book a free call with NOCD to learn more about treatment options. I hear that you have exciting things that lie ahead for you. I hope you consider taking the next step forward and connect with recovery. Please don't hesitate to call: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fEWzOAGaypY treatmyocd.com In the event you feel you are in crisis please use crisis resources immediately. Call 9-8-8 https://988lifeline.org/ Text HOME to 741741 crisistextline.org Call 9-1-1 or go to your nearest Emergency Room https://www.treatmyocd.com/emergency-resources