How do I get rid of these thoughts or calm down

I've been really overwhelmed with thoughts of detransitioning even though I don't want to like thinking I'm not a boy. It's been making my anxiety go up like crazy but I've never had this problem this much before, and I've always felt so proud of who I was and stuff but I don't know why this is coming up all of a sudden and I'm scared. I don't want to detransition but these thoughts won't go away. I often have feminine interests and have been trying to get into a better mindset and I feel like those things are making me feel more feminine and I don't want to feel that way.

djflorio

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 19w

I understand how hard this is. It may seem backwards, but the thoughts aren't actually the problem. The attempts to get rid of the thoughts or gain complete certainty that you don't want to detransition is actually what you want to work on, because that's the real issue. Thoughts work in a funny way. The more you try to get rid of them, the more they pop up. Imagine that you're at a crowded party, and there are hundreds of conversations happening all at once. Now imagine that you REALLY don't want to talk about politics while you're at the party, and you make it your goal to avoid that topic entirely. Thus would put you on high alert for that conversation, and any words that are related to it. In other words, by focusing on NOT hearing those conversations, you'll start listening for them to make sure they aren't there. It's easy to imagine how this would make you much more likely to hear those conversations. Any word even remotely related to politics would grab your attention. This is basically the same thing that happens with our thoughts. As soon as you try not to think about something, you'll pick out even the tiniest thought related to that thing, among the 1000's of other thoughts in your head. So the real goal is to learn that you don't have to get rid of the thoughts, or the anxiety they bring up. That will happen on its own. And the more you practice not resisting them, the less scary they will become. The less scary they become, the less likely you'll notice them, and the less likely they'll arise. Remember that thoughts are just thoughts. You don't have to solve them, argue with them, or get rid of them. The brain produces tens of thousands of random thoughts every day.

catrockstar143

Date posted: 17w

gender identity ocd tips

I'm starting testosterone soon and suddenly I'm feeling more anxious about regret and being wrong. I was on reddit (that was my first mistake) and a post popped up on my feed and it was a cis woman saying she did some soul searching and realized she wasn't a trans man after all. she said that she was a tomboy growing up and dealt with trauma that she needed to detach from. it shook me a bit and now I'm scared that I'm making the wrong choice. does anyone have any tips to get rid of this constant doubt?

g_rangel

Date posted: 11w

spiraling again.

i had recently been triggered to have so-ocd. its been on my mind non-stop. (i am a heterosexual female) and my mind has been all over the place questioning if i have been in denial the entire time. ive always had people tell me they sort of got that vibe it it never really affected me until my own mother had her suspicions. so i would constantly get triggered un public around the same gender, while knowing my true sexuality. ive always been attracted to men but as of recently ive been having super bad anxiety to where i cannot eat or sleep and feel weak all the time. it was like that for a week or so. now im in the calm where i have been trying accept the uncertainty but it still isnt fair as im getting triggered. im a little worried because it feels like i have been lying to my parents the entire time although ive never had the desire to be with the same gender. and i keep getting intrusive thoguhts that make me feel anxious and uncomfortable. its all starting to affect my friendships as im constantly getting triggered with the intrusive thoguhts. i feel a little less anxious compared to how i was a couple days ago. im really scared on why im having these thoughts now when i have been having romantic feelings for a guy the past year or so. ive also been struggling with false attraction and loss attraction to men. it makes me feel uncertain of my life the entire time

landonw

Date posted: 24d

It’s Intense…

Today I woke up and immediately was flooded with intrusive thoughts. I was thinking about how I want to remembered when my time on earth is finished. I want to be remembered by my kindness and my heart. I want to be remembered by the lives i’ve changed. But then it hit me. What if you want to be a girl? What if you’re just telling yourself you don’t want to be a girl? I shouldn’t be scared, my family would love me no matter what I was. But this.. This is taking its toll on me. People call me maam all the time. I have feminine features and qualities.. It makes me question everything I know about my life. But I think what makes it worse is that i’m scared but don’t feel scared? Like I don’t feel intense fear like I once did. I know that I don’t want to be a girl. I don’t want boobs or long hair and nails. I have feminine qualities but I just exist. And this morning it’s hitting me very hard. I hate TOCD. I hate that I can’t just have one moment of peace. That it finds ways to seep into my life by finding areas i’m weakest in. I read other people’s stories and kinda do checking with it. And to make it all worse my for you page is FILLED with trans tiktok’s and peoples experiences. It’s making me mad. Why can’t I just be happy? Like everyone else in my house? Why did I inherit this stupid fucking disorder? And why do I question everything single thing about myself. First it was fear I was going to hurt someone and be a monster. And now it’s fucking thoughts of me wanting to be a girl?? Anyways have a nice day guys.

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How do I get rid of these thoughts or calm down

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