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Hello! Do you have a therapist trained in OCD to work this through? Reading your description, I too do much of the same in my behaviors. I never realized how much OCD was a part of my life that was the actual driving force for other manifestations in my life. I like how you describe these as “missions to complete in your mind”. I feel like that too! And having to return to them when there’s more time, to feel relieved and completed and just right. The key, as I understand it, is to do the opposite of what you are compelled to do, little by little until you can tolerate a lot of things not completed or checked or right for you, and repeating this until the obsession in you stops. Start with sitting with the discomfort and delaying the missions, and work up your way up to the hardest task when you are ready to more daily succeed - at not acting out your obsessions with the compulsions. If you have an OCD specialist therapist, you can tailor what’s right for you to create “exposures” that trigger these missions in your mind - acknowledge them as you did - and then do the work of challenging them!!˚°‧🫧⋆.ೃ࿔*✨