- Date posted
- 5y
- Date posted
- 5y
I can relate to this to a certain degree, its important that we become aware of this and start working on it ASAP, losing interest and excitement for things we used to enjoy is a symptom of depression, I dont want to make anyone overtly worried, but just be aware of your feelings guys, lets all work out damnest to be the best versions of ourselves we can be! We can get through this and we will!
- Date posted
- 5y
I know but how tho? How do i get the joy from the little things back without forcing it? Its about feeling it i csnt force the feeling bevause that not natural and for me thst will cause anxiety because i csnt handle when i dont feel things genuinely
- Date posted
- 5y
SAME SAME GIRL OMG. My friends and I usually sit around and watch movies on Fridays and that was THE SHIT. Omg the vibe was so goooood like just me and my mates chilling with the fireplace watching a movie and it’s especially amazing on Christmas cause the vibe is so cozy and comfortable. And last week I couldn’t even get into it omg. I was panicking like crazy because I thought I’d never be happy again
- Date posted
- 5y
Ugh i feel you (my nocd app acting up so i see all my notifications days later :( ) i hate it soo much to. My sister and i alwayd did this harry potter marathon in the winter and like this year shes all excited again like she used to be but im a whole nother perosn like im living in an alternative world where theres no happiness and cozyness and i wish i could match with her excitemend but all i can do is be anxioys
- Date posted
- 5y
@hocdgirlsummer I can relate to this soo much. I just hope my Christmas isn’t ruined because I LOVE Christmas
- Date posted
- 5y
This is so spot on. I used to be such a happy going person who is always laughing and now everything and I mean everything is so dark and numb. Like I am just nothing.
- Date posted
- 5y
Period. I hope for you to get out of this state and feel things genuinely and naturally again. Its so hard like this i feel like it takes the meaning ofmy life away. Like im jusr floating around jn this world and being numb is all i can do. Know ur not alone! I suffer what you suffer and we both gotta get trough
- Date posted
- 5y
Also one of the things I do to fight this is to pick up an interest I used to have years ago and hadn't indulged in for a long time, sometimes when things seem routine they can lose their magic. I used to really like watching anime but after high school I kind of stopped, now that I'm going through a kind of rough time I started watching it again and it really helps me. Try to break from your routine once in a while! Go to a new coffee shop, a new Restaurant, a Museum a Park, anything that can help you out of this loop!
- Date posted
- 5y
Hey! Thank you for the tip:) i will try this. I have been trying it but for me its more thst the oversll thing loses its magic. Like imagine makeup used to be my biggest passion but thst lost its magic but right before hocd fsshion was my passion and i lost it too. Its like evrything i try to enjoy and be excited over loses its sparkle. I really appreciate ur comment snd help and i will try it out becsuse trying will never do wrong :)
- Date posted
- 5y
This has literally been me. These thoughts have developed into incredibly suffering emotion, I feel like a bottle with everything holding inside of me, while everything on the outside is having the best time while I can’t feel it. I don’t feel any sorts of happiness. At all. This is so bad I’m sorry we all have to go through this. I don’t know about you guys, but I can’t get in touch with a therapist due to many reasons, which further crushes my hopes of becoming better.
- Date posted
- 5y
I can 100% relate trust me. Like u explained thst spot on snd know that ur not alone. It feels comforting to hear thst im not alone in feeling these weird feelings. I always think that if i got this bad and this fcked up in a year, it has tk be possible to switxh back in a year or more too righ??
- Date posted
- 5y
By the way, same i cant get a therapist. Im 17, they hella expensive, the waiting list in my country is about 1-3 years long... i have to fight this shit on my own
Related posts
- Date posted
- 24w
I feel different from others, I don’t feel as feminine and I feel like I’ve changed. I’m not sure why I feel this way. I also don’t think my ocd is ocd, it’s just something I told myself to feel better. I know! What if I am what if I’m not, I get it, but I don’t feel like i have a choice in the matter anymore. I have soocd and it’s eaten me alive for years. I woke up out of my sleep and got triggered and here I am. I don’t know what I feel anymore. I always wanted a boyfriend and now It seemed to change. I don’t want a girlfriend, it’s just that I don’t see anything for myself and I feel like I’m hiding. It’s hard to explain. Plus sometimes the way I move or speak makes me feel more masculine and it kills me. Im feeling so lost and alone right now. I know what I want deep down but I feel incapable of having those things because I won’t be able to have feeling. If that makes sense.
- Date posted
- 23w
Lately, I’ve been feeling like something has changed in me — like I have changed, and like my feelings for my boyfriend have faded or shifted. It’s one of the worst sensations I’ve ever felt. I keep thinking things like “I don’t love him like before” or “I’ve changed too much to feel anything now.” Sometimes when he calls me or makes a joke, I get irritated for no reason. I feel like I’m being mean, cold, disconnected — and then guilt crashes down on me. I remember how I used to feel: warm, close, expressive. And now… I just don’t feel the same. That makes me think: “Maybe I’ve fallen out of love.” But I’m also constantly anxious. I overthink every moment. I can’t relax into anything without analyzing if what I feel is “right.” It makes me wonder — maybe I haven’t actually changed. Maybe I’m just overwhelmed and tired from months of these thoughts and fears. I don’t know how to feel right now. I just want to believe that this disconnection isn’t proof that love is gone, but a sign that I’m scared and burnt out.
- Date posted
- 7w
Every time I say smthn I like about my body or ask myself questions (likley a compulsion) or even just being around my bf I feel like this frog in my throat/nausea feeling. Why?? I never used to feel that before all of this. I love my body and I love being a woman I have no desire to be a man, maybe to try out semi masculine/tomboyish styles for funsies but that’s it. Ex- I was saying just now I do like having smaller boobs even tho they’re not super big or visible when I wear baggy clothes (that’s been bothering me lately. I’m wearing a sweater rn and I can’t see them ;-;). Then I end up in a loop of “if there was a button in front of you to turn you into a man would you press it” my brain jumps to yes but I don’t want that I don’t think. Idk. I’m just confused. I don’t feel like myself anymore. Certain nicknames my bf gives me make me anxious or nauseous but if I didn’t have this I don’t think they would. He reused a nickname I haven’t heard since I last saw my half siblings so maybe that’s where it’s coming from? I like the nickname it’s cute, especially when he says it out loud. I think I’m just weird with nicknames tbh. I like calling him nicknames but I haven’t really been called anything till we started dating. It started with honey, meu amor, meu anjo, and habibi/habibti (he’s Arab, I’m Brazilian. Banger food combo. We’ve joked about opening a fusion restaurant lol) and it’s kinda evolved from there. Idk the nauseous feeling has been persistent lately. Especially cuz his parents hate my guts rn 😀and likely will forever should be and I get married. Which I do want. But then my SOOCD comes in screaming NO YOU DONT YOURE GONNA LEAVE HIM AR THE ALTAR FOR *insert friend I have a false attraction to* (I’m pretty sure it is false attraction. I don’t like her in that way. But every time there’s a joke I get a groinal response and panic internally. We’re not close and I don’t get excited to see her or want to be closer to her the way I do with my bf/before he and I started dating. I know what a crush feels like. But I feel like I’m going insane and that it isn’t ocd and I’m just losing my mind and I don’t love y bf). I love being back at university but also hate it at the same time cuz I live in an all girls dorm. Which is. Great. When my ocd makes me think I’m a lesbian. And all my friends are queer so this kinda doesn’t help. The friend that is specifically being targeted atm is a lesbian. Lately it’s been her for a while. How long does it take for it to jump false attractions? Cuz I’m worried that if it lasts a certain amount of time it’s a real feeling. I also just get groinal responses around my friends a lot and it bugs me. Why am I feeling a twitch and feeling wet? We’re playing cards? Oh god am I turned on by an entirely different friend than the usual target cuz she’s wearing shorts? Like😃😃😃I’m losing it lol I also feel generally numb? Like idc if this happens with him, idc if he can’t see me. But then when I can’t see him or if I even imagine smthn happening I start sobbing. There’s currently restrictions on guests in the dorm so we can’t even cuddle or hang out in silence. He came to pick me up the other night to go for a drive and it was nice and wonderful but I did feel a tad bit anxious. Maybe it’s cuz it’s been 2 months, I’m worried about meeting his parents, he has 2 jobs and has classes, I have classes and a club presidency to deal with, I’m on vyvanse, etc. multitude of reasons but once we eased into it I felt better. We kissed a little and all I could think of was “I love his eyes and his smile” I was worried I would hate kissing him. But I loved it (idk it’s like my brain wipes the memory and is like “lol do you even like kissing him or having sex with him??” And it’s putting in memories of me being uncomfortable and annoyed by his kissing which I never am. Sometimes his mustache and beard are pokey but I think that’s normal lol) even when I enjoy things my brain is like “nah you’re GAYYYY🫵AND on top of that! You’re likely a man who is denying that he is trans. Here’s a name for you that you never asked for or conjured up!” Idk if anyone else’s ocd does that. I like being a woman, love it some days. Neutral most days, whcih I did read is normal, cuz you’re just going about your day as you are. Not thinking about it. Not feeling anything wrong. I never did till this shit. I don’t think about it often but one night it just hit me like a freight train “what if I am trans and suppressed it? I mean I was a tomboy as a kid.” But I know plenty of tomboys grow into cool girls so. ??? Idk. Ramble over. I have class🫡
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