Anonymous

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 12w

‘Late in life lesbians’

I keep seeing tiktoks of things that are like ‘things I did as a lesbian in denial’ or ‘things my not so straight straight friend said’ and I feel like I might relate to some!! But idk!! It’s kinda triggering me. I’ve had this 5 years on and off now so when it comes back the whole well you’ve had it so long you must be gay comes up. I have been with my boyfriend almost 6 years and i love him so much I don’t want to be gay (nothing weong with it - I’m just not and don’t want to be!)

Sexual Orientation OCD

Anonymous

Date posted: 12w

That are intrusive thoughts, no worries

Anonymous

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 12w

@Anonymous Thanks! I know deep down its just rwally difficult when im in a rumination to see it clearly!

Ms.shelovesf...

Date posted: 12w

You’ll be fine girl, this is soocd. With time (whether you do erp and get better or you choose to indulge in compulsions and don’t get better) you’ll realize that eventually you’ll discover nothing 😭🤣🤣

Ms.shelovesf...

Date posted: 12w

@Ms.shelovesfrogs It’s an ocd cycle not a journey of self discovery 💡🤯you’ll learn how to live with the loud stranger called OCD (YOU WONT FIND OUT YOUR SEXUALITY CHANGED) when you’re ready to get out of soocd shitty trap(can’t blame you because soocd is brutal and recovery is stressful) you’ll take erp seriously and intrusive thoughts as though they are nothing..soocd is fear based and imaginary based.. it has none to do with your actual orientation.. it’s just our brain “glitches” causing us stress

Ms.shelovesf...

Date posted: 12w

@Ms.shelovesfrogs You could follow soocd and ocd based content creators on instagram to learn more about this(Im also a content creator that recently started)+ I genuinely hope you get better. Try icbt and erp for soocd

Anonymous

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 12w

@Ms.shelovesfrogs Thank you - its horrible because the duration if time I’ve had it like i havw good periods then it comes back and it comes back using the amount of time as ‘proof’

Ms.shelovesf...

Date posted: 12w

@Anonymous That’s proof it’s ocd. I can relate to this, usually it gives you a “teaser” then comes back+ it’s not uncommon for it to come back. Matter of fact, many ocd sufferers are currently experiencing themes that have come and gone before

Anonymous

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 12w

@Ms.shelovesfrogs I am trying so hard with erp - i just had my best remission (best word to use!) period of ocd recently after 6 months of erp therapy. Its just this horrible triggers and spikes that xome back :( The thing it i know it doesn’t change. Plus having so ocd for 5 years i have thought more about and looked into sexualities more than most people s I think I’d have realised by now if i was! It’s just the whole what if your in denial sucks!

Anonymous

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 12w

@Ms.shelovesfrogs Thank tou i will have a look!

AnaHills

Date posted: 12w

I have the same thing😭😭😭 I just got married with my husband. We were 8 years of relationship and now we are married. I have 9 years with this lesbian ocd, and now it’s back this shit :.( It’s harder for me because I see him all the time and I feel like “you are a bad person, you don’t want to tell him the truth” 😭😭😭

Anonymous

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 12w

@AnaHills We are talking about engagement soon and I have always dresmt of that, ans don’t want ocd to ruin it! I hope you have some periods of relief from this. Id you ever wanna talk about it let me know!

geodrimilis

Date posted: 12w

Sexuality isn’t some fucking thing that can change anytime if that was the case no one would know what they actually liked

Masc4lesb

Date posted: 17w

LESBIAN DEALING WITH SO OCD

I am a 18 year old masc lesbian with a loving girlfriend for 1 year, and I have been lesbian for almost my whole life and I have never been attracted to men in any way. flash to my past, My ex girlfriend who used to identify as a lesbian had cheated on me with a man. Recently I saw this tiktok of this masc lesbian turn straight and my friends and girlfriend made jokes I am going to turn straight for my male best friend. My male best friend came over and he’s a great guy but I do not want him in any way. when him and i were hanging out my mind threw in a thought it was “What if i like him”, i came back home and i had the worst panic attack and i felt so sick, i cried and i cried. ever since that day I have been struggling with intrusive thoughts, i don’t want a man in any way, and i feel comfortable as a lesbian but these thoughts won’t stop and they become worse when i see people say being lesbian is a phase or that i haven’t met the right guy or i’ll change in the future. i just want these thoughts to stop, i don’t want to stop being a lesbian ever, i love women so much and i just want all of this to be over with. i do not want a man in any way and im tired of my thoughts doubting myself and i hate the “what ifs”, I just want to be my old self, I want to be happy with my girlfriend.

Masc4lesb

Date posted: 16w

LESBIAN WITH SO-OCD

I have been doing okay for the past week or so and was really happy i felt that i was getting back on track, but today i went on tiktok and i saw something triggering which was “i thought i was a lesbian for 4 years until i met my now boyfriend” and it triggered me very badly, i have been crying all day and i can’t seem to make myself feel okay. i feel like im lying to myself that im not lesbian and i truly want men, but when i get any thought about men it feels disgusting and wrong and not me, i don’t want men i feel so sick i want to get out of this. i always felt so happy as a lesbian im so stuck i don’t want to be with a man. i have a loving girlfriend i just want to be happy with her.

Masc4lesb

Date posted: 16w

LESBIAN WITH SO-OCD

hi i’m a lesbian! and i have known im a lesbian for a really long time and i have a sweet girlfriend of 1 year. it all started when i saw this masc lesbian come out as straight, after that i had my guy friend over and he’s a sweet guy and he was flirting with me (he didn’t know i was gay) im not sure but i panicked and my brain froze and i was like “do i like him”, ever since my brain has been over worked 24/7 for 2 months now and it’s spiralling constantly. im trying to control it but all these thoughts are so disgusting and my brain tries to put him and i in scenarios that make me uncomfortable and i feel panic and i hate it. i have always been comfortable being a lesbian and i still am comfortable as a lesbian, but i dislike these thoughts i have about him and men and i want it to be over. i do not want to experiment with men even tho my brain is telling me i do, i find it disgusting and i dread it, i have a sweet girlfriend and i want to be with her forever, i do not imagine anything with any men and i hate these thoughts. im scared of becoming bisexual/straight one day and i hate hearing sexuality is fluid. its a whole mix of comphet and so-ocd

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‘Late in life lesbians’

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