user74128588493
- Date posted
- 22w
hocd
i’m scared i’m bi and in denial and trying to convince myself im straight.
AnonymousAnonymous
- Date posted
- 22w
Just letting you know you are not alone!! I literally struggle with this as well and is so scary.
user74128588493user74128588493
- Date posted
- 22w
@Anonymous i read what it is like to convince yourself you’re straight and it feels just like me.
noone9noone9
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 22w
Try allow the thought just to be... I never realized how not gay I am until I just allowed the thought... Simple approach to OCD, do opposite what you're inclined to do, and it goes away
noone9noone9
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 22w
@roxyto9876 Sorry for confusing you. I struggled with the thought and even a desire to be with another guy, and fought it, argued against it and all that. But by just allowing the thought, not fighting it, not agreeing with it, it lost its power.
DreamydreamDreamydream
- Date posted
- 22w
Same /: have u ever experienced tocd too?
user74128588493user74128588493
- Date posted
- 22w
@Dreamydream not really. wanna talk????
DreamydreamDreamydream
- Date posted
- 22w
@user74128588493 Sure
user74128588493user74128588493
- Date posted
- 22w
@Dreamydream okay basically i’ve had hocd and it was quiet for a while. it came back in a huge spike and now im scared im secretly bi and just trying to convince myself i am straight. it feels right but i don’t want it to be. i’m not freaking out that much. i know 100% i like boys but what if i am suppressing feelings for girls.
DreamydreamDreamydream
- Date posted
- 22w
I feel the same way unfortunately. It’s scary and i don’t want to be and before ocd hit i never questioned my sexuality ever.
user74128588493user74128588493
- Date posted
- 22w
@Dreamydream i looked up what it would be like if i was bi and just convincing myself to be straight and it felt just like me and i don’t feel sick. i’m scared it’s true.
DreamydreamDreamydream
- Date posted
- 22w
@user74128588493 Me too I’m scared it’s true
user74128588493user74128588493
- Date posted
- 22w
@Dreamydream why does it feel okay? like being bi would be easier bc i could be with my bf still? what if i am just suppressing my feelings for girls and i don’t even have ocd?
DreamydreamDreamydream
- Date posted
- 22w
@user74128588493 I think that after awhile of ur brain being in over drive it gets tired and that’s why ur not freaking out or feel like u “like” it or it feels ok but it’s not true
user74128588493user74128588493
- Date posted
- 22w
@Dreamydream but i can’t stop researching on tiktok and google about what it feels like to be bi or to have hocd? i’m so scared im bi and accepting it?
DreamydreamDreamydream
- Date posted
- 22w
@user74128588493 People who want to be bi or gay don’t do extensive research to figure out if they’re gay or not. They like who they like and they don’t care or put any thought into it. The same way us straight people feel when we like someone. Do you do excessive research ab being straight? No cause u want to be and u don’t have any problem w it. This is bringing us distress which means it’s the ocd talking and trying to convince u that it’s true
user74128588493user74128588493
- Date posted
- 22w
@Dreamydream so it is my ocd and i’m straight? i’m not just convincing myself im straight?????? im also a strong christian
DreamydreamDreamydream
- Date posted
- 22w
@user74128588493 You’re straight - you’re what you always been before all this ocd doubt came into play. It plays on your biggest fears and makes you doubt yourself
user74128588493user74128588493
- Date posted
- 22w
@Dreamydream it happened when i was 12 though
DreamydreamDreamydream
- Date posted
- 22w
@user74128588493 This theme?
user74128588493user74128588493
- Date posted
- 22w
@Dreamydream yes.
DreamydreamDreamydream
- Date posted
- 22w
@user74128588493 Well that’s okay it’s still OCD related
anonymousssmmanonymousssmm
- Date posted
- 22w
I’m going through the same thing and I understand you very well. Hope you feel better soon:)
user74128588493user74128588493
- Date posted
- 22w
@anonymousssmm can we talk?
anonymousssmmanonymousssmm
- Date posted
- 21w
@user74128588493 Sorry, I just saw that you replied to me week ago. If you still want to talk , we can:)
[Deleted][Deleted]
- Date posted
- 22w
Comment deleted by user
user74128588493user74128588493
- Date posted
- 22w
@roxyto9876 does it feel like you’re trying to convince yourself you’re straight and only like boys?????
user74128588493user74128588493
- Date posted
- 22w
@roxyto9876 same!! can we chat?
user74128588493user74128588493
- Date posted
- 22w
@roxyto9876 okay! do you have snapchat
johnsarryjohnsarry
- Date posted
- 22w
Worst feeling in the world i would like to say i have this and more it's horible. Bet you probably do to 😂
- User type
- Therapist
- Date posted
- 22w
It’s really tough when your mind keeps questioning things that matter so much to you. These doubts and fears can feel relentless, but you’re not alone in facing them. Help is here at NOCD and we can assist you in finding outside help if needed too. Would love the opportunity to work with you here at NOCD—just ask to be matched with me by our care team or any of our therapists who would also be able to help. Also, here are some helpful resources: https://www.treatmyocd.com/blog/bisexuality-so-ocd-the-invisible-so-ocd/ https://www.treatmyocd.com/what-is-ocd/common-fears/fear-of-being-straight-ocd https://www.treatmyocd.com/blog/is-hocd-same-as-so-ocd/ If you’d like additional support, feel free to book a free call with our NOCD team. We’d be happy to share more information and explore ways to help. No one has to live in fear of their own thoughts. Also here are some helpful resources: https://www.treatmyocd.com/blog/bisexuality-so-ocd-the-invisible-so-ocd/ https://www.treatmyocd.com/what-is-ocd/common-fears/fear-of-being-straight-ocd https://www.treatmyocd.com/blog/is-hocd-same-as-so-ocd/
Serio?Serio?
- Date posted
- 22w
OCD will keep you stuck in a cycle of “what if this is real and I don’t do anything about it” and “what if it’s not real and I make a mistake”. It’s better to try to stop solving it and let the answer come to you
user74128588493user74128588493
- Date posted
- 22w
@Serio? it feels real. it can’t be true. why do i feel calmer about being bi than gay?
user74128588493user74128588493
- Date posted
- 22w
@user74128588493 like i knew gay wasn’t right but now bi im scared it is.
Serio?Serio?
- Date posted
- 22w
@user74128588493 Honestly I can’t tell you. Your emotions seem completely out of wack
charbocharbo
- Date posted
- 22w
This is my biggest problem as well, it comes and goes and has been like it for years. I’m so drained from it and if I’m honest at this point I don’t even want to be alive :(
user74128588493user74128588493
- Date posted
- 22w
@charbo it was pretty quiet with groinals and scared im attracted to girls but my attraction to bf was so strong so i didn’t think about it now it came back and im sick. like what if i liked it and was suppressing it now it is just coming to the surface????
Related posts
user74128588493
- Date posted
- 23w
hocd and scared it’s internalized homophobia
I’ve been struggling with HOCD for years, and it started with an intrusive thought about being gay when I was younger. It came up at age 12 and ever since, I’ve been trapped in a cycle of doubt and anxiety. I obsess over whether or not I’m secretly gay, even though I don’t feel that way at all. What makes it worse is the fear that I might have internalized homophobia, and that’s why I’m having these obsessive thoughts. I worry that my anxiety is a sign that I’m repressing something or rejecting part of myself. It feels like my mind keeps repeating the same question—am I gay?—and no matter how much reassurance I get, the fear doesn’t go away. I used to pray for my family members, fearing that if I didn’t, something bad would happen to them, and now it feels like I have to control these thoughts, or something will go wrong. For a while, it was quieter, but a week ago, the thoughts spiraled up again, and now the anxiety feels overwhelming again. It’s exhausting, and I don’t know how to break free from this constant loop of doubt. Has anyone dealt with the fear of internalized homophobia alongside HOCD? How do you manage the anxiety that comes with it?
user74128588493
- Date posted
- 22w
hocd
i have had intense thoughts and fears about being gay today and i have been sick to my stomach. it just stopped and now im scared im accepting it and im not freaking out. i feel like im okay with it. I AM NOT OKAY WITH BEING GAY.
youllwintheb...
- Date posted
- 19w
hocd
I feel like I'm lying to myself, like I just don't accept that I'm gay, I don't want to be gay, I don't want to feel any kind of attraction anymore, I want to go to a psychologist to find out if I really have hocd or if it's just an excuse, because it feels like I really am gay, but nothing was authentic, it all started with thoughts that made me panic extremely hard and I felt like crying and I had delusions, I don't understand why this is happening to me, I didn't like any boys before the thoughts appeared, but exactly one day after they appeared, all the boys were attractive, of all ages, I want to recover :( I'm only 17 years old, for about 2 months I've been having thoughts, I don't know what to do, I can't go to a psychologist, I need help :(
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