Inferno
- Date posted
- 5y
There’s hopeThere’s hope
- Date posted
- 5y
It only makes sense because of OCD! I promise, what you’re describing is 100% OCD. You’ve never pictured your life with a woman or had feelings for one. When I was in the closet I had feelings for women, often. I pictured my life with them. I really, really, did. And when I came out it was this moment of “wow, this makes so much sense!” If you’re sexually and romantically attracted to your boyfriend. If you love him and don’t want to lose him. Then I promise you, you are not a lesbian. I am extremely close to so many lesbians and we’ve talked in depth about their experiences and they’ve never loved or been sexually attracted to men. This sounds very much like OCD. And like I said, I’ve experienced both. Being queer feels absolutely relieving and right. If you’re worried, or think you’ll lose him, I’m willing to guarantee you have nothing to worry about, girl! This sounds nothing like the queer experience and everything like ocd lies!
Ridethewave Ridethewave
- Date posted
- 5y
Thank you so much, I'm trying to even figure out if I'm bisexual or not during this time because it all just feels so damn real its genuinely made me question myself. I honestly wouldn't mind being bisexual, it's just of course OCD has to tell me to adopt a full blown lesbian lifestyle. I'm happy youve found a comfort in who you are btw❤️❤️
lifeofmlifeofm
- Date posted
- 5y
I appreciate you taking the time to talk about this!!❤️ it’s complex for me because I have HOCD (at least I think) and I’ve had sexual attraction to men, but really only have felt those feelings in my mind and when I would actually have an encounter in real life, I would feel kind of bored and uncomfortable and anxious. I also have a thing where in my life I have become absolutely obsessed with women who are smart, powerful, usually much older than me- it takes over my life and I spend much of my waking hours just thinking about them and feeling so strongly about them, wanting so badly to be part of their life- but the feelings have never been sexual. All of these things make me so confused and it’s just maddening when you’re obsessed with them every single minute of the day ?
There’s hopeThere’s hope
- Date posted
- 5y
Of course! I’m a bi woman. And I swear, even though I had it internalized, I have always known. And when I accepted it, it felt RIGHT. And I know OCD. Because my OCD feels wrong. Coming out as bi felt right and good and there were never intrusive thoughts, even though I was nervous. OCD feels wrong. This never felt like that. They’re completely different feelings. If these thoughts feel intrusive, I’d bet my life that it’s not real.
Ridethewave Ridethewave
- Date posted
- 5y
As a bi woman, is it that you are interested in dating both men and women? Or is it strictly sexual for one gender and romantic for the other?
Inferno Inferno
- Date posted
- 5y
1-If your bi were you bi from birth? 2-Can you be straight later in life 3-how does the word fag/gay affect you when people say it and make jokes about it 4-Why do lgbt ppl always want straight ppl to be gay or convince them their gay(like James Charles)
There’s hopeThere’s hope
- Date posted
- 5y
@Peridottttt 1) Yep, I’ve always been bi. 2) Nope, I will never be straight. Labels can change overtime but I’ve never met a person in the community who has come out and then later identified as straight. 3) When people use those words in a bad way, especially people outside of the community, it hurts me. It really hurts, we’ve been oppressed throughout history and using slurs just makes me remember that a lot of the world still hates us. 4) We really don’t. We often encourage people and try to make them feel comfortable and accepted if they’re questioning (questioning is different from OCD, I promise! Questioning isn’t intrusive, OCD is). James Charles is a power hungry manipulative person. People like that come in all sexualities, straight included. Some people are just bad. But as far as I go, and the people in the community that I know, we don’t care if anyone’s striaght. We don’t want to convince them they’re gay if they’re not.
Inferno Inferno
- Date posted
- 5y
@KBright Omggg thank you for taking your time and answering my questions but I’ve got a few more if you don’t mind
Inferno Inferno
- Date posted
- 5y
@KBright I’ve heard a couple ppl that was bi and now is straight... what?
There’s hopeThere’s hope
- Date posted
- 5y
It’s very much both! I want to date both men and woman, AND it’s sexual for both. And I’m comfortable with that. Also, since you were concerned, I want you to know that having a low sex drive doesn’t make you asexual! I’m very familiar with the community :)
There’s hopeThere’s hope
- Date posted
- 5y
Aww, that’s so sweet! I want you to know that labels are just that - labels. If your primary concern is losing your boyfriend, then nothing else matters! OCD is such a bully, and it targets what we love most. You love him, and that’s that! But I promise no lesbian has ever been in love with a man, haha! You’re going to be 100% okay. ?
AsnkuAsnku
- Date posted
- 5y
Hey thank you for this. For me I know I am lesbian and i suffer form hocd because I only get really uncomfortable about being with a women ( no hate tho it’s for me how I feel) and somehow does not make feel like me. Still somehow it can take me over and make me think I really have feelings girls and that’s annoying I only get anxiety for it and nothing more...sometimes it make me think I want it even I know I don’t so yeah but when I have good moment it’s always about boys and about my real crush who is boy so yeah does not make a sense
AnonanxietyAnonanxiety
- Date posted
- 5y
Helloo
Inferno Inferno
- Date posted
- 5y
Are you hocd?
AnonanxietyAnonanxiety
- Date posted
- 5y
YeH I think not diagnosed but similar thought
Inferno Inferno
- Date posted
- 5y
Yeah can you invite more ppl with hocd/gay/lesbian, let’s just talk and ask questions and not be judgmental
AnonanxietyAnonanxiety
- Date posted
- 5y
Thoughts*
Ridethewave Ridethewave
- Date posted
- 5y
I have HOCD, it's rough out here
There’s hopeThere’s hope
- Date posted
- 5y
I’m a part of the LGBT community. I don’t have HOCD but am more than happy to answer any questions if you need me to!
Inferno Inferno
- Date posted
- 5y
Yeah I don’t talk to anyone In real life about my hocd nor feel comfortable talking to them about my hocd because they would say I’m homophobic and that I’m gay and didn’t know or I’ll turn gay later in life smh ?♀️
Ridethewave Ridethewave
- Date posted
- 5y
I'm worried I'm just Asexual now. Do asexual people enjoy sex? I enjoy it but i have a low sex drive.
There’s hopeThere’s hope
- Date posted
- 5y
Promise I won’t call you homophonic. OCD is sooooo complex. You’re okay, love!
IdkIdk
- Date posted
- 5y
Can I ask what the sexuality is and how you realized that was your sexuality?
IdkIdk
- Date posted
- 5y
@advice? Your * sorry. Please don’t share If don’t feel comfortable sharing.
Inferno Inferno
- Date posted
- 5y
Today someone told me that hocd is homophobic and scared to be gay, and they asked my why would they be scared of being gay? I didn’t want to argue because they didn’t understand ocd I’m kinda upset that they think we’re scared of being gay and we could slowly over time change our sexuality this was very triggering for me ??
There’s hopeThere’s hope
- Date posted
- 5y
The queer experience is SO different from the OCD experience. I’m happy to help distinguish them is anyone has any questions!
Ridethewave Ridethewave
- Date posted
- 5y
My entire ocd thing started when I was sleeping in the same bed as my bestfriend when we were traveling together and I enjoyed her company in the bed and then I thought "what if that makes me gay?" and then it all went down hill from there. I then woke up in panics with the thought "your gay!" and I would cry to bf because I thought I was going to lose him. I kept researching and researching and my attraction to men started to fade and that made me even worse. I never pictured my life with a woman, nor have I ever had feelings for them but now this is all I can think about and I'm scared I'm just in denial ?? I love my bf and I don't want to lose him. I am sexually and romantically attracted to him but my mind is telling me I'm a lesbian???? How does this make sense. Please help??
Inferno Inferno
- Date posted
- 5y
Thank for not saying I’m gay because I have hocd or convicted me that I’m gay
helpmyocd123helpmyocd123
- Date posted
- 5y
I have hocd I hate my life
Inferno Inferno
- Date posted
- 5y
We can talk about it here periottttt
helpmyocd123helpmyocd123
- Date posted
- 5y
Do u have any tips ?
Inferno Inferno
- Date posted
- 5y
First listen to NF a rapper about ocd Second talk to an ocd therapist Lastly calm down, know it’s a lie and smileeeee ??
Related posts
Parisx
- Date posted
- 24w
SOCD is back with vengeance
I’ll cut a long story short… SOCD/ HOCD was one of the first themes I got when I was a teenager. The first one was health but I didn’t know that was OCD at the time. Anyway, I have had SOCD for 11 years. Sometimes it leaves me alone and it feels like I’m my own self again! Don’t get me wrong it lingers but I manage. But… IT IS BACK!!! My head is telling me that I am a lesbian and that I need to just admit it. I hate it. I have a boyfriend who I love unconditionally and this has just sprung out of a dream I had -.- I don’t want to be a lesbian! The groinal responses have always been the worst. It started when I was around 16, I woke up one morning and my brain just said ‘you’re a lesbian’, as you can imagine I freaked out, panic attack and cried. Then, my brain starts looking into my childhood… well it’s had a field day. When I was around 9 my friend showed me girls kissing on YouTube and then I suppose I got addicted to it. I then used to play on Habbo and walk up to girls and say ‘kisses’ etc. my brain is now saying that this is evidence that I’m gay. I DONT WANT TO BE A LESBIAN!!! I have no issues with gay people, I just don’t want to be gay myself. Sometimes, when the thoughts come in I don’t seem to get anxious but I get groinals and that freaks me out! I just want peace. I hate this. I get so many different themes. Now it’s this one and I just want to crawl under my duvet, sleep until they’re gone but then I end up dreaming about it!!!
Ellie.
- Date posted
- 22w
I’m begging ANYONE help I can’t take it anymore!!
I feel awful that I keep coming on here whenever I’m down bad but oh my gosh OCD is the most painful shit that I have EVER experienced in my life and I have a physical chronic illness…. I hate to say it but I hate living right now it’s too painful… im crying as I type to the point where my stomach is hurting, I have pretty severe ocd I do have generalized anxiety and idk if that is connected with ocd but because of that I have most of the subtypes REAL EVENT OCD,POCD,ZOCD,ROCD,SOCD HARM OCD, you name it and I got it!!! a lot of also why I have have those theme is trauma growing up and involving those things^ as of right now i’m 25 and a women with the most loving boyfriend in the entire world before my ocd hit me I NEVER questioned my love and care and attraction with the love of my life I always knew I was going to marry and be with this person the rest of my life! Now with ocd it confuses me soooo much and now I think I’m gay and didn’t realize or indenial and listen I get it “don’t look for reassurance!” “It’s not the thing ocd is attacking that is the problem ocd is the actual problem!” Here’s the thing with that if I’m in a relationship and I’m gay that would mean I would have to leave that said relationship and to say that “oh yeah that stuff happens and you’ll move on” is absolutely devastating to me this is THE LOVE OF MY LIFE and your telling me that iv been lying to myself this whole time or that I didn’t realize?!?!? And that sexuality can change (even though some say it can’t google says otherwise and some people have said it can’t idek anymore) and all this other BULLSHIT I can’t take it WHY?!?! why does this have to happen why can’t I just be with my love the rest of my life?!? and yes before anyone says anything I have been attracted to girls more so when I was younger watching lesbian porn liking the body’s and fantazing them sexually it stopped when I got older but I still don’t get disgusted with women who are pretty it just makes me uncomfortable because I’m with the love of my life and before I remember talking to my partner and discussing certain childhood things I experienced and we discussed that we both could be a little bi and for certain I’m (demi sexual so I don’t even really care about looks) and I truly didn’t care!! NOW I do care even with being bi because again I don’t like thinking about anyone else but my partner but I do also know my parents are homophobic and I do think about if I am gay they wouldn’t be okay with that and I also dont want to deal with that so now I sound like in indenial right?!???? I didn’t even care about labels before my ocd it just didn’t matter but now it’s effected my sex life and it’s hard for me to enjoy sex with being so confused I’m so confused I googled everything can you still have sexual fantasies with same gender but still be straight? Can you fantasize about same gender or imagine marrying them all of it !!! And non of that disgusts me it just makes me uncomfortable AGIAN only bc I just love the partner I’m with right now!!! I’m so fucking confused do I have to leave my partner and accept that I’m gay is that going to happen in the future if I get better with ocd and find out it’s been true all along?!???
Mt2019
- Date posted
- 17w
Question about HOCD
Sorry long post. Anyone feel like now they’re just in extreme denial. Like when I was little I noticed guys more than girls in movies and was more drawn to them. I remember changing my mindset to switch that. 98%of my life has been straight until recently. I felt drawn to some guys but never thought of it sexually. Always had girl crushes dreams and porn. Now I watch porn and I feel like straight takes longer and then I go and watch gay porn and feel nothing until I tell myself it’s two attractive dudes and love is love and imagine physical sensations and then it hits like suddenly. Like I have to convince myself it’s alright. Then when I try again I can do all that but feel nothing and then straight porn works. Idk if it’s just getting a fix or the first time works with anything or what but it’s confusing. On top of that I’ve felt girl relationships including my wife maybe miss something and a guy maybe matches that feeling that but then I feel like I’d be missing something without a girl or my wife. Idk I’ve had some rough times in life with male figures in my life but idk. I feel like I have to convince myself more and more that I’m straight even more than the first time I dealt with this. Can someone relate? Please
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