Why does my pocd always try to tell my I agree with bad stuff or tell me bad stuff is normal etc… I don’t agree with it but it feels like my body and brain does but I always am like wtf after I get the thought but sometimes if I try to let it pass that feels like I’m agreeing with it. Like omg bro I hate this
Hello friend! Yep, that is how it works. If you want to know why it works that way it is because OCD craves certainty that it can't have. It wants you to review things to make sure you are reacting the correct way. It will even give you bad thoughts and such to try and induce what it sees as the "correct" response. The issue is there is no perfectly "correct" way to react. Yes, if you have a bad thought, you might feel disgust. But what if you didn't? Well then, your brain tells you, you are in trouble. However, and this is key, you can't control your thoughts/feelings. You cant make yourself feel disgust at will. You might feel it, you might not. Neither response can truly be controlled, no matter how much you might want to. OCD sees that as a huge problem. It sees that lack of emotion as a confirmation of the worst. However, it doesn't know what it's talking about. All that really matters is what you choose. If you have a bad thought, let that thought happen and choose to move on. Don't feel a certain way? Great. You can't control that. Choose to move on despite the anxiety you might feel at your lack of response. That's how you truly "agree" with the thought. You aren't confirming it's truth. You are confirming that you can't have certainty about what your OCD tells you must have certainty about. "Are you sure that doesn't make you a horrible person?" Don't say no. That's engaging with it. It doesn't deserve even that. It's a petrified worrier. Don't take it's suggestions seriously. "Maybe. Maybe not. I'm not sure at the moment. I'm going to go back to reading this book now." And then you do that. I'm sorry you are going through this. Remember you are stronger than you think and that you are not your thoughts!
This!! ^^
@Iceberg Climber Yes exactly! Thank you for this comment. That’s literally what happens like if I have no response to the thought or if I get one and just feel neutral my brain tries to replace it …. If that makes sense? Like “oh u had no reaction so that must mean u agree with it” … then I start questioning myself like oh do u agree with it or I’ll picture weird scenarios and see how my brain and body reacts and sometimes it doesn’t react the way I want which freaks me out more
@dee012 I completely understand. What you should start practicing is squashing those questions. They don't deserve answers. You don't need to dignify it with a response. That's the only way they'll ever fade into the background. I know it seems like it is very, very important to answer the questions, but they are a trick. I believe in you! :)
Im also dealing with this, feel very numb to it all like I should think its worse than what I actually do, if that makes sense!
@LizM99 Yes that makes sense! I am sorry to hear:( but it is nice to know there are others who relate
I deal pretty heavily with this. The last couple days, I’ve had what I think are urges. Something pops into my head intrusively and then what stems from that is me WANTING to just indulge in it even though it’s gross. I get worried bc I used to struggle w thoughts about my dad for a long time until eventually I just purposely thought of him while self pleasuring and got off to it. While that’s something I did, it is NOT me. It all stemmed from my mental health declining a couple years back, I was never this way before. So I get worried that it almost happened or might happen with my pocd cuz I could never live with myself if it did.
Im having weird scary pocd thoughts and i really hate them, i feel like theyre my own thoughts and im freaking out
I am 15 years old and my POCD feels like its not POCD, i feel like i like my intrusive thoughts, but i have more intrusive thoughts about having intrusive thoughts, and i feel like i cant enjoy the things i normally enjoy anymore, like calling with my girlfriend and joking with her because this is still in the back of my mind, its making me question morals and if i ever even viewed P as completely wrong and i hate this so much, i love my nieces and nephews and when they're over i know id never do anything with my intrusive thoughts but when they arent present i feel like i like my thoughts. Before this i was dealing with HOCD and ROCD and i wish i could go back to that
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