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@mindfullymaddie I did tell her that I do have issues being comfortable around kids or handling them the right way bc I had a dysfunctional type of family so I don’t really wanna say or do the wrong thing and I was an only child but I also told them that babysitting my baby cousin helped with that a lot and so does her letting her daughter play with me and stuff. After that I think that’s when she brought up the baby sitting. I just feel weird and I am also regretting saying that part as well. I didn’t bring up ocd tho. I just get scared that any little thing I do is pdo or harmful. It drives me crazy lol. But im getting better at handling it. I just have avoided kids a lot and wonder if this exposure would be good I do get these weird disturbing “what if” thoughts Like what if I hurt them or do something bad There’s no proof it just scares me

@mindfullymaddie I think the thoughts just being there freaks me out. Like thoughts alone is enough to make me not even want to be around children anymore. I think this theme is my worst one. Because harm OCD, like the nature of the thoughts are more acceptable under intrusive thoughts umbrella, but POCD thoughts alone cause me to feel disturbed and anxious. I think another fear of mine is the groinal response . I’ve had it happen before plenty of times but I don’t want it to happen when im baby sitting