- Username
- Anonymous
- Date posted
- 5y ago
I feel exactly same
I wish I could have a new brain
@JS0406 I wish I could have my old back
I did stuff when i was a kid and that is my proof. I mean i was child but i am using it against myself. I was actually kinda forced against my will but i still tell myself you liked it cuz you would not really have done it otherwise. We will always find proof in our past.
I think what scares me is that I switched my tinder years and years ago for a couple minutes cuz I was curious and I found myself being curious about lesbian couples instagrams too before my hocd hit. And I had no idk why I was curious I just was and now I think it’s cuz I was all along and now I’m denying it ??? I never thought I was even when I did those things.
I did stuff I think every kid does at some point ocd will try and get it’s hands on anything
@Ocdandme123 I try and not think of any past stuff as proof but it’s so hard
@Ocdandme123 Yeah it’s hard because we doubt ourselves of everything
Ok sooo, best way to recover is to do active exposure work. After you do a practice session do not give your mind fear to the situation, stay in the exposure for long enough and continuously. This will help your anxiety rise and fall on its own. This will also give you confidence.bnext when you get the thoughts or feelings attribute them to ocd and not you and continue with the exposure. After you do this a bunch your feelings and anxiety will go down and you can see things in a better perspective
I’m scared to do active exposure on my own. Would it be better with an ocd specialist?
My thought would be if i lost my husband to this i would be alone for the rest of my life instead of live that way.
I think I’d rather die than not be with my bf and be a lesbian.
@Ocdandme123 I’d rather die than do anything with a guy but of course ocd says no you wouldn’t you would do it.
@JS0406 I’ve drunkenly hooked up with a girl so it makes this feel so much fucking real and worse. It was years ago tho and I did like it but didn’t want to go out looking for it after. I still wanted guys and now I think is it because I liked it but just tried denying it and lying to myself
Do your steps to recover and these things will drop!:)
I thought I got rid of it for a week but no it came back and it’s hit hard this time
Prob because you are analyzing and ruminating
And I gave into a compulsion and got aroused before I could even think about it
What thoughts r u referring to
Hocd
Yeah i have the same theme
It feels too real
What feels real ?
I think he meant hocd feels so real
@Asnku Yeah it feels like I want it
The thoughts
Guys this is all ocd! The ocd will give you this to make you buy into this illness! But don't let it! Trust me when I say that when you disregard these things and keep doing your ERP, it will get better! But you need to do your steps. if you don't then this will get worse!
What are “steps” to recover cuz I’m struggling with how to even start
It's always more easy to have an ocd specialist to guide you through your specific case but in reality they are going to get you to do active ERP. So you should start now. If you find it difficult to do, then make a list of all of your compulsions and number the least anxiety provoking to most and then start at the bottom of the list for exposures. After doing one for a constant amount of time and you no longer feel anxiety for that then move to the next one.
I’m so sorry I feel dumb asking but can you explain what an example of a compulsion is and exposure
@Ocdandme123 I know what exposures are lol but I get confused on pairing them together with what to do
@Ocdandme123 A compusion is anything that you do to stop feeling anxious or get rid of the thoughts
@Crawfish Oh okay! Thanks hah sometimes I get confused
I obsess about this theme too. And vaginas gross me out. But i have to keep thinking about it to make sure they still gross me out. It makes absolutely no sense. Like im gonna be forced to make this decision someday and i better be 110% sure of this. It almost feels like a life or death situation.
Yeah and if I don’t feel disgust I take it as proof but I still worry I’m going to act on it even though I’d rather die.
I understand totally. I guess we have to accept things could change in the future or they stay the same. It doesnt really matter. You would think that being grossed out is proof enough but the brain is super powerful i guess.
I know that scares me what if I have a family then decide might just have to be alone for life. We can reassure ourselves as long as we live but ocd will never be happy.
Yes. Im actually married. But theres a part of me that knows i still love him too. Im telling you our brains are so powerful they trick us into believing anything.
Yeah suppose it is sometimes known as the doubting disease
Right now I feel like I am going to act on my thoughts, or like I’m capable of acting on them, or like if I liked my thoughts. But I don’t want to! Then why does it feel like I did or like I wanted them?? It’s really f*cked up bc it is confusing me and my intentions. And now I can’t no longer know the answer to that!! It’s really frustrating and distressing, sometimes I can be sure about the answer but sometimes I just can not and it’s the worst. I legit feel like I’m going to act on them, why do I feel like that?!! I feel like I’m turning into a psychopath!!😫
I'm so nervous that I like the thought. It feels I want it and I when I try to react I can't. It's like I just don't even want to fight it anymore. I know deep down it isn't true, but it feels so real right now. Anyone else have this?
It sucks, and it’s hard to understand that these thoughts aren’t mine cause why does it feel like I’m getting excited by them as well? When that should be the last thing that should be happening. It only convinces me more and I just sit there after feeling it like “what am I supposed to/can do about this?” And I just feel distraught cause if it’s not what I want, why am I feeling something like that towards it? When I should be feeling something more negative?
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