[Deleted]
- Date posted
- 12w
Cupake21211Cupake21211
- Date posted
- 12w
It was horror because they are not actual feelings and it’s the confusion and doubt like you know your one sexuality inside in your heart but your brain tries to co fuse you
Cupake21211Cupake21211
- Date posted
- 12w
Omg I can relate to this so much
Cupake21211Cupake21211
- Date posted
- 12w
I have always been straight and now I know that this is my overthinking like what if I’m ocd or not
Cupake21211Cupake21211
- Date posted
- 12w
But I realized it started from middle school when I saw and had gay and lesbian friends and I was scared what if I am that and I would also cheak in the past like I know I was straight but what if that’s not what actually I felt during that time
Cupake21211Cupake21211
- Date posted
- 12w
I completely went through the same scenario and it’s horrible because everything to outside everyone assumes that your perfect but then your suffering and I didn’t even know this was a type of ocd until now and its been there since a few years I am here to support you
Cupake21211Cupake21211
- Date posted
- 12w
@spelamarela I get now even this second someone was talking about being lesbian and I was like they were not even talking about me but I got stressed but I think recently what I have been doing is you know your heart desires one thing and the reason your ocd feels real is the fear it only gives thoughts that are relevant after that I started realizing this is all but real because you feel fear but think imagine your self you your brain will always try if you do this or are that sexuality your happier however I then realized it actually is not what I actually desired think is this what you actually desire or is the fear driving it your fear of am I that is making it worse I know it’s easier said than done but think it’s all but real it’s just ocd wants me to have fear
spelamarelaspelamarela
- Date posted
- 12w
@Cupake21211 Thank you! This actually helped me a little
- Date posted
- 12w
I relate. All the thoughts swirling around when I’m in a panic distract me from my true feelings. I’m on medication for ocd (I’ve been diagnosed) and I’ve been feeling calmer and caring less about the thoughts and that scares me that I’m accepting it. I’ve been checking myself with so much gay content that now it’s all over my fyp and I can’t escape it. Sometimes in moments of calm I realize that I’m actually straight, but then a few minutes later I get a trigger and I go back into the cycle. It feels too real.
Cupake21211Cupake21211
- Date posted
- 12w
@ I know I get what you mean like your in such confusion
mgr11mgr11
- Date posted
- 12w
You are not alone! I feel this way too. The “proofs” really discourage me! I am still working through it. My advice is to delete ChatGPT. I know it is used for everything now, but I became addicted to “talking” to ChatGPT (asking for reassurance, overanalyzing and explaining things, ruminating, checking, etc.) Deleting the app has helped my research compulsion tremendously! Also, look into purchasing “Overcoming Unwanted Intrusive Thoughts.” I just finished it and it has SO much good information.
spelamarelaspelamarela
- Date posted
- 12w
@mgr11 Thank you so much!!! Is “Overcoming Unwanted Intrusive Thoughts” a book, a workbook, or something online? And how did it help you? Does it help in the long term? So I can get rid of this forever
mgr11mgr11
- Date posted
- 12w
@spelamarela It is an actual book, but I bought highlighters to highlight all the good info! If you want a workbook, I am just starting “the Self Compassion Workbook for OCD.” The book has helped me feel less alone and realize how common these thoughts are. I finished a few weeks ago (and I am also in therapy), but the book gives you techniques to help with the thoughts. I can’t say for the long term yet. I am hopeful though! I wish the thoughts would go away forever, but I’m teaching myself that they may never go away. Instead I can learn to not pay attention to them and let them pass by like leaves floating down the river or an object on a conveyor belt.
spelamarelaspelamarela
- Date posted
- 12w
@mgr11 Thanks! I’ll definitely give this a try.
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