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Hello, chess player myself here. I kinda didn't figure out on which topic you need advice for. Yes, usually most of the chess communities' participants are men. Classic. You cannot control other people's beauty standards. But you can control what progress you are aiming for. People's preferences are chaotic, one likes brunettes, another likes tall girls, third doesn't care and wants a matching personality. You can be only yourself. And if you want, you can make it better <- here is what you can control. Comparing to a girl you know? Awesome. That means you want a change in something. Is it height/color of the eyes? -> drop it, don't waste energy here. Is it something changeable? Great. Now you can have a new goal and work towards it! Working towards goals is great! About these men talking about 'look at that chick'.. ehh... sounds childish to me. About them not complimenting you? I don't know. If I was in a community with a girl, I wouldn't compliment her 'you are so hot', it's cringe and disrespectful. 'You are beautiful' is cringe and risky too. I wouldn't (in a group). About telling a crush that you like him because he reminds you of your ex and you think that that was unhealthy? I agree with you. Inviting a girl for exposure? Kinda didn't understand the purpose of this, but I guess to not be the only girl? We tend to overestimate how much others judge us. Most of the time they don't really care, they just have their own life & problems. And that's normal. Good luck on your endgame strategy tonight ♟️

Advice for tonight , try to live in the moment. Don’t sit and mentally prepare for what might happen or what won’t happen. Just be present and act in the moment. These people don’t live in your head. So any extra time you spend in your head worrying about what will or won’t be, is time taken away from them. And they will have no idea why. So just try to be present and don’t engage with your ocd in a battle of thoughts. You won’t win that battle anyways because ocd always has that next “what if” loaded. When the nights over , don’t engage with ocd then either. That urge to sit there and mentally review the night will be strong. Don’t give into that compulsion. You can’t undo what you did anyways. No reason to answers OCDs questions of “did I say the right things or wrong things”. Just know you did the things, and that was the goal. :)

You remind me of myself ! I’m sorry I know how hard it is to struggle with insecurities try to look for what you find attractive about yourself what you like about yourself think of that instead of her and realize you’re pretty too and there’s no need for comparison and if they all start hitting on her and especially the one you talked to even though it wasn’t the most healthiest way than he’s clearly not the one and that’s ok you will find someone that is enjoy the game and the night and remember you are beautiful and don’t let your mind tell you different try writing stuff down you like about yourself too it helps after a while even if you don’t believe it at first you eventually will good luck !!! And hope you win the match I also understand not having many friends my circle is a triangle with one friend I rarely talk to the rest family so i totally get it hope this helps ! 💕

So? Maybe they see you as a friend that is why they are not making comments about your look.