Anxiety around consent? Advice?

Idk where this comes from? I am anxious all the time about intimacy that I’ve literally turned people off by trying to make sure consent was completely there. I am anxious about it all the time. I think about past intimate experiences months or even years later wondering if I accidentally co *er ced them. Like wtf. If I even decide to ask them if they felt like I did that they say no but sometimes I can’t take no for an answer with this question so I get worried and end up asking again. Idk how to let this worry go. I overthink everything about this and it drives me crazy. I am still young and navigating intimacy in a healthy way so I worry if I’ve ever done or said something from ages 15 to now (almost 21) that have made people feel pressured without me realizing it. Any advice

Izzy.FM

Date posted: 3d

To me, the fear that you’ve done this thing without realizing says a lot more about your character than anything else. If you had coerced someone, for example, it seems like you would have noticed/apologized immediately, rather than letting it slide until it was too late. From what I understand about being human, people who truly intend to harm others don’t ruminate on the possibility that they have, and those that harm accidentally are readily willing and able to apologize whenever it’s brought to their attention.

dee012

Date posted: 3d

@Izzy.FM Thank you for your comment. There have been times where I felt like I misread signals or ignored a hesitation because I misinterpreted it as something else, and I apologized sincerely to them and even apologized to the point where the other person was confused as to why I was so distraught. I think I’ve had one situation where someone told me they felt “seduced” or something and even then I apologized a lot and they were kinda confused. But thank you again for your comment. I guess with something as serious as consent, people all view it differently so all I can really do is take my worry seriously and be extra careful when it comes to situations like that. Better to be safe than sorry!! It’s just with ocd I ruminate on all past interactions I have to shake my head or like force myself to stop thinking about it

Izzy.FM

Date posted: 3d

@dee012 Rumination is such a pervasive part of my OCD as well! And it’s so difficult to disengage without participating in some sort of reassuring thought process.

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