I’m so unbelievably stuck. I don’t want to to want to leave my husband and I don’t want to feel so negatively towards him. I’m in this loop where I’m grateful we’re committed and married and that I refuse to leave him so I don’t have to fear losing him and then I feel all these negative feelings and ocd tells me I’ll feel awful with him forever then and freaks me out that way. Any advice?
I know exactly how you feel but how I know a lot of my worries are ocd is because I’ll have all these negative horrific thoughts and worries about my relationship but then when I finally break and own up to it and get it off my chest to my partner it’s like I can finally see the light, I feel this weight lifted for a short period and I realise how I actually feel without the mental illness and it’s always love and care for my partner but then the ocd does eventually creep back in and I realise if it wasn’t ocd I wouldn’t really ever have the overwhelming love feeling, and I do, but it just hides behind the horrors
@loola Yes that’s what i experience too so that helps a lot! Sometimes it’ll just latch right on to a new thought tho or shortly after the compulsions (such as reassurance seeking when asking your partner questions regarding it etc). That I think is what makes it so hard to remember or know for sure.
I’ve been researching ROCD and things to help figure out your compulsions and that way you can work on exposure response to said compulsions. I’m finding it hard to know what my compulsions even are. Also I feel I can see it after a spiral but never in it.
@Soliel I just don’t feel I understand how this works. Like the thoughts and feelings I have feel genuine and like they come from me. Can OCD really do that? Cause you to have bad feelings and not just thoughts?
@Iwanttogetbetter2025 Yeah, but I’m right there with you, it doesn’t feel like OCD to me either. I think this is a block tho keeping me trapped…. Or at least that’s what im choosing to believe now bc everything I’ve tried on my own hasn’t worked. Watch the videos from NOCD about ROCD. OCD alone literally makes you have sensations, physical reactions, etc. not just thoughts… u can research about that too to try to help understand it more. That’s all I know to do right now because I feel I’m in the same boat as you. I’m still wondering if this is even OCD but choosing to give this treatment a try but get stuck on that a lot so today I’m trying to research more. Because mine and yours too it sounds like just doesn’t sound like the things they explain exactly but I know that can be OCD too (just right ocd) and I def have that. Sorry I know this may not be helpful…
According to NOCD, OCD can produce intense, unwanted intrusive feelings and urges—not just thoughts—that feel very real, often triggering a fight-or-flight response. These feelings are ego-dystonic (contrary to your true values), involuntary, and are often mistaken for intuition, making them feel like a genuine, urgent, or emotional threat.
@Soliel That helps me…. Of course my ocd brain doesn’t want to believe it tho and still says but yours is diff but right there’s the answer. Right it down if u need to and every time u ask yourself it say no, you already know that answer and refer to where u wrote it down if that helps, like see it’s right there already answered. And then no matter what your mind says u need to do u don’t u just go on abt your day knowing you’ve already answered that what if…. I think that’s the intrusive thought tho, like u get the feeling u don’t want and it makes u think this means something…. Then u gotta figure out what that is. But u don’t. OCD just tells us we do. And eventually, it goes away.
@Soliel So you’re saying you don’t think I have ROCD?????
@Iwanttogetbetter2025 I took it as it is OCD
@Iwanttogetbetter2025 But I’m no therapist so u should see what your therapist says specifically
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