15 years old bed bound with existential OCD & DPDR

Hey, I'm new to this app I just found out about it, I really need help. Everyday for the entire day it feels like a nightmare, I wake up, open my eyes, and immediately feel like my existence gets stuck in a tunnel. Everything feels 2d and I'm scared that I'm hallucinating everything, almost like a Boltzmann brain. I feel 100% detached from the world, I'm scared this is a simulation and I'm the only real person. I don't know what I am, where I am, what this is, I feel completely lost. I am so scared of existing and death, there is no safe space. I'm scared this is a simulation because then when I die someone can just unplug it and I will be gone forever, completely erased. It seems like society is all zombies just working all day, watching shows, achieving "goals" that mean nothing, but I do the same thing, so what is there to do? Even if everyone was "real" in the sense that they have a consciousness, they aren't. If there isn't a "soul" or a "god" then we are all just chemicals, atoms and neurons, and whatever other materialistic things that make up the universe. Love, feelings, happiness, thoughts, aren't real. They are just chemicals and atoms. We are all "zombies" Which would then mean everything that I feel isn't real either which makes me feel empty and alone, I want things to be real. I wish I could feel like everything's okay but I don't. And I truly think it is. I wish god was real or some type of creator with good intentions but all religion seems man-made. I don't know anything and nobody does, all I can feel is fear. I'm scared of death and I'm scared to live, to exist or not to exist is terrifying. As I'm writing this I feel completely detached, I'm confused and scared. It feels like some distorted movie that I'm looking at. I don't feel like I'm experiencing it - it's just happening. It feels so surreal that I can see anything, and I am existing at this very moment. I wish I knew what I'm experiencing but I don't have an answer, I wish someone had an answer. I'm scared of the universe when I die what's going to happen, just nothing forever? I don't want to be nothing forever, but I don't want to be something forever, forever is terrifying. Everything seems scary and I don't know what I want. That whole text above is what I wrote in my journal - that's how I feel. For backstory, I've had these thoughts since I was 10. I started thinking about death and the universe and I started freaking out, this lasted for around 6 months. I was put on Zoloft and I was on it for 5 years until this year, 8 months ago I stopped it cold turkey, I read that it affected height, and I'm short which also has something to do with my depression and isolation. This whole year I've been home all the time, I don't go to school, barely see friends, I've basically been bed rotting the past year. The Zoloft helped for 2 years, although when I think back I was still scared of everything, and I don't know when my dpdr started. But I think it really went downhill last summer I smoked weed for the first time with my cousin and had a panic attack, I thought I was going to die, my chest was warm, my body got tingly, and that started another existential problem for me. It then feels like a blur since then. Around a month and a half ago I was up all night, I drank an energy drink and I was standing in the living room with my mom and I thought how I felt so disconnected from everything, I went back to my room and my heart rate went to the sky, I had a crazy panic attack, went to the ER, and ever since then it's been getting worse and worse. I went to a new psychiatrist 2 weeks ago he prescribed me Prozac, hydroxyzine, and propranolol, when I went to the ER they told me I had an irregular heartbeat and I read online I shouldn't take those medications while on it. So everyday I was checking myself, my heart would feel weird, I would freak out, and go to the ER. I've been to the ER twice since I had the panic attack 2 months ago. I'm scared I'm going to lose my mind, my uncle and grandpa both had schizophrenia, I'm scared that the weed might have brought it out and I'm becoming schizophrenic. I just started therapy 2 weeks ago, I'm not sure what kind of therapy and if he specializes in cases like mine. I want to switch therapists. I also see videos on TikTok that freak me out, like an illuminati conspiracy theory and all the comments are talking about how we're in a simulation, I saw one video that used science and a study to prove that we're in a simulation and that still stuck with me. There's more I could write but this is getting wayyy too long, I just need help, I'm very scared and very confused.