IMPORTANT MAY HELP YOU As my usual slight hocd attack started (it was nowhere near what it used to be but i still had a little feeling in my stomach) i decided to sit with my thoughts for a couple of minutes to calm it and i came to a though that will help me so much in the future and it makes sense Every straight person has the same thought we do about wondering whether we are gay or bi or whatever , but to them they're just another one of their thought our HOCD clings to these thoughts making us think they are worth something , so to get over don't give them any importance because they don't deserve any . you are no diffrent to anyone else you have the same thoughts yours are just manipulated , i beleive in you all

i hope it helps when i thought of it it made a huge weight lift off my chest , we are like everyone else we have the same thought

Do you have HOCD too?

yeah this can work both ways i've heard of cases where a gay person has it about being straight

@lucyolivia No, it isn't that. I just wanted to know the difference between ACTUALLY being gay and HOCD. I've been having a hard time distinguishing it

@ProsperwithOCD Same question. Idk why I just smiled thinking about being bi. Like I wanna be with boys more but I've lost my attraction completely. Do you have any attraction?

@lemondew Just sexually to both sexes. It’s so confusing.

@ProsperwithOCD I'm sexually attracted to boys but I am interested in romantically being with both sexes. Its more confusing like I don't want to have seclx with a women ughh

@lemondew being gay is like enjoying a relationship with the same sex and wanting one , actually liking the thoughts about it in your head , HOCD is when you worry about it and your thought about the possibility make you unhappy and cause you stress

@lucyolivia Ok, im kind of relieved to actually know that it's a symptom of HOCD. Thank you :)

@lucyolivia But is it weird that a year before (before HOCD) i considered being bi? But then I realized I only got attracted to boys romantically and sexually so I left it at that. Again prior to 2 months before HOCD I kind of felt like I was a biromantic heterosexual. And now I want to heterosexual again

@lucyolivia But I honestly have a neutral feeling of romantically being involved with girls. I prefer boys more!

@lemondew it seems like you don't have a clear path for your sexuality at the minute , i don't know what it is but just know that it's okay to be unsure it doesn't matter at the minute what your sexuality is , you don't need to label it . But also don't try to push yourself to be one of the other , you'll know in your heart who you like and don't like you may just need to sit with your thought for a while to figure them out

@lucyolivia Thank you for the advice. I really appreciate it. I think after talking to a few members im kind of feeling good today

@lucyolivia I just suddenly went over what I wrote to you, immediately regret it and now I'm really out of place. How would I ever know?, I'm scared to go out and look at other girls and know I am going to admire them. Is this something common in HOCD?

@lucyolivia Also last thing, there any way to possibly get my attraction back? I feel like I have no soul and empty without this feeling. I kind of sat with my thoughts for a while like you said and I reflected back when I was a kid and the exciting feelings I had for the first time being with a boy. I think I know what I want at this point in life but im scared of the uncertainty though I've accepted it

@lemondew it's very very common and the best way to over come it is to do it , put yourself in situations that cause you anxiety and whilst there realise that they are just thoughts , your thoughts arnt always true so what makes these thoughts diffrent to any other of your 60000-80000 thoughts you have a day , remeber you HOCD feeds of these thoughts don't give them the satisfaction of doing so , as soon as you realise that they're not your thoughts and they're manipulations and that it doesn't really matter what your sexuality is , the sooner it will start to go away and you'll find out naturally who you like and don't like

@lemondew i feel like as soon as you work on your hocd and come to terms with it your feelings will start to come back as it's your hocd pushing them away , it's almost like they're still there but your hocd covers them and doesn't allow them to show as it's manipulating your thought , litrally i've pretty much overcome my hocd in 3 days by just telling myself they're not my thought and they don't matter , don't give them any weight in mylife because they don't deserve it , i know in my heart who i like and if this changes in the future that's okay it doesn't matter

@lucyolivia Thanks again. I feel at least a bit better. I do these things by goin out almost every Friday with my mother but my heart starts beating, I feel fatigued and get groinal responses. I also notice girls a lot subconsciously ever since I developed HOCD.

@lucyolivia I hope I find out who I really am and get rid of HOCD and start living a perfectly normal life like I used to. Though uncertainty is still something Im scared of I am not willing to act upon any of my thoughts nor do I wish to. Now that I think about they were always uncomfortable to think about and my natural thoughts were always males.

@lemondew YES YOUR GOING TO GET OVER THIS by best tips would be to not give them any weight or any importance as they're just another one of your thought that don't mean anything , if you feeling panicked sit with you thoughts even though it may be scary and realise that they don't matter what matters is what is inside your heart , and don't let them see that they bother you because as soon as they see you panick of them they feed and grow bigger . The uncertainty use to bother me aswell and i realised eveything is uncertain in the future , you may start to enjoy something completely diffrent in school , you may want to change your dream job at age 40 , you may decide you want 15 children , all i know is we don't know what's going to happen in the future and we have to learn to be okay with that . i just want to say I'm not a professional on this and i've only just started to get better but i've done a lot of research so i hope this helps and makes sense

@lucyolivia I see. Well I have read sexuality is something fluid and after talking with you for so long I think I'm kind of ready to accept uncertainty again. I just now realized I had this problem for almost a year, around the time I suspected myself of being bi but I never wanted felt that way. I remember kind of forcing it to seem "cool" or "different" (though I was uncomfortable). I had little anxiety of it but I was like "whatever,it's not gonna happen". Then 4-5 months prior I got scared I was gay after watching a gay scene and my HOCD came into full action. A month or two later I accepted the uncertainty but this all started again causing more doubts. I'll try my best to accept it again. Thank you so far :)

@lucyolivia I sat calm and just went through my thoughts and I realized my what my heart has always wanted and what it enjoyed. At last it was my mistake of trying to be "different" and unnecessarily getting scaredthat caused all this mess. Im still kind of anxious but I feel like I can do this

@lemondew Good point. We’re all kind of looking into our own minds and not our hearts.

@lemondew i'm so proud of you , you've really got this i beleive in you and i'm glad my advise helped a little bit

@lemondew I believe in you as well

@ProsperwithOCD Thank you for believing in me :)

@lucyolivia Thank you very much I hope get to achieve it :)