is this rocd or is this something more?

i’ve been having troubles in my relationship. it’s been very one sided on feelings and by that i mean i’ve realized i’ve been too focused on mine rather than remembering the fact that my partner has feelings too. that he can get mentally exhausted also. i thought that maybe i needed to work on myself more and i do i know that to be true. i apologized to him for just realizing that. we’re learning to really come together on both of us being better for each other. the progress we have made has made us proud, but still i find myself going back to those thoughts and feelings. i’ve gotten better communicating those to him. he understands that i can overthink, he just still questions why id even think that way to begin with. back early in our relationship, i used to be so confident on his feelings for me. it doesn’t matter how many times he tells me or shows me, i still fall into questioning what if he doesn’t really want to be with me. what if he’s getting ready to leave and find someone better. when i ask him a question about what i’m thinking in that moment, i can just see in his face the shock because we would be having such a normal moment. i’ll question his ego and wonder if he feels like we’re equals as if he thinks he’s better than me. he can look at me a certain way and i’ll question what he really thinks of me. i’ll apologize to him for things that i can’t help when he’s not even affected by whatever it is I’m apologizing for. i’ll imagine him at his worst when he’s given me no reason to believe he’s that person i can see in my head. sometimes i get worried that i’m doing something just to upset him. i want to be better for him, he doesn’t deserve to have to constantly reassure me if we’re okay.