I can get behind the idea that arousal doesn’t mean much... our bodies can get excited for all sorts of reasons that don’t mean we’re sexually attracted to X. Sometimes when I’m aroused I also feel the arousal as a sensation in my chest/lower body... I’m wondering if that sensation DOES denote actual sexual desire. It feels more personal than a groinal response reacting. But, perhaps “arousal” refers to more than a groinal response, after all? Sensations might also be part of the random physiological nature of arousal, which can be expedited by stress or fear of anxiety. I’m concerned about accidentally using people in my life for sexual gratification... who gets to decide if a desire is sexual or not? I don’t want to engage with X sexually... but if my body (groinal reaction & upper body) is aroused by a “harmless” action...even a harmless, fun action, I wonder if engaging in that harmless action for mutual, innocent fun, would actually be... gratifying myself? I don’t want to do that...that seems like it may be immoral.