People with hocd I have a question

I don’t think I do?? I honestly don’t know anymore. I don’t want to but what if that’s cause I just think it’s wrong? Honestly I don’t think it’s wrong though, my best friend is bi and I’ve hung out with her and her gf before and was fine with it. I was raised in the gay community (I’m a cheerleader), and knew what it was at 7 but I never thought I could be that and I had nothing against it. I also grew up in a really open family so idk I’m just so lost at this point

@annehatesocd It sounds like your thoughts and true feelings are getting confused. If you don’t think you do, then any confusion after that honestly sounds like anxiety to me. You can be around or friends with people in homosexual relationships and be totally fine and supportive of them, but that doesn’t mean that you are gay. There’s a big difference. Another thing about HOCD is that some people will actually come out as gay, have relationships with the same sex, and get no relief from it. That kind of sounds to me similar to you thinking your thoughts are true.

@jcplunk Does it sound like hocd or that I’m just gay? You can be honest

@annehatesocd It sounds like HOCD to me. Could I comment some links for you to read that have helped me?

@jcplunk Yes that would help so much. Anything to help me rn this is awful

@jcplunk I actually came out as gay to my mom after realising I had HOCD (sort of) and I didn't feel any "happiness" instead I burst out uncontrollably crying

@lemondew I tried before and I started sobbing lol, I told my parents “I’m sorry I just don’t feel anything for girls but my mind keeps telling me I do and I hate it” and ya it was a mess and im still a mess

@lemondew HOCD Links https://moodsmith.com/hocd/ https://centerforanxietydisorders.com/hocd-intrusive-thoughts/ https://centerforanxietydisorders.com/treatment-programs/obsessive-compulsive-disorder/hocd/ https://www.ocdtypes.com/test.php https://ocdla.com/sexual-orientation-hocd-gay-ocd-treatment-2-1970

@jcplunk Thank you for sharing the links. I've been to moodsmith before and it did help me. I'll check the other ones later.

@annehatesocd Idk if you're going to believe it but at first I told her I was gay, not even 10 minutes in and i said again, I'm bisexual but none of them sat right with me and I wanted to be desperately straight again. Like I was sobbing and crying, I couldn't handle anything at all. The night was a whole mess

My question is, is it gay to think “omg how can any guy reject her” when you think a girl is just super pretty I would never do anything with them I’m just like how could someone that pretty get rejected?? I feel like this makes me sound like a lesbian and in denial. Kind of like you thinking that of a guy.

@annehatesocd It’s really not I know I may sound like I’m helping but it’s not my exes and even sisters would say a girl is really pretty and all of that but do not think it’s gay

@Mod22 Phew okay cause legit even last night I was crying about my ex (he left me four-five months ago) and I can’t talk about it without crying. And I’m like if those feelings weren’t real I would not be so heartbroken about it.

@annehatesocd Yeah I feel so right now also broke up with my ex around that period

My question is, is it gay to think “omg how can any guy reject her” when you think a girl is just super pretty I would never do anything with them I’m just like how could someone that pretty get rejected?? I feel like this makes me sound like a lesbian and in denial.

You can be honest

And it’s like I wanna be as pretty as them and it’s only with like those really pretty girls on tik tok. Or I think I wanna be as pretty as them hocd has really screwed me and my perception up

@annehatesocd Omg same!!

@lemondew Do you think what I said to? Like my original question, about seeing a pretty girl and going “omg how can any guy reject her?” And like I compare myself to her

@annehatesocd Yeah!! I'm very anxious right now. I had that some thought a while ago and I came to kind of get some help

@lemondew It’s awful. Hocd sucks

@annehatesocd I know...I have a boy I really started liking who I met like 2 weeks ago and now this sudden thought in my brain has convinced me I'm forcing myself

@annehatesocd Lol I suffer kinda same. Hocd false attraction is most worst part in my own hocd I think. But no it does not make you lesbian if you think someone is pretty. It’s like you watch beautiful sunset but I don’t think you are sexually attracted to that XD