ellen24

Date posted: 6y

I have really bad HOCD. It’s the only intrusive thought I’ve ever experienced. My therapist is 100% convinced it’s HOCD. I’ve had short relationships with boys and my feelings for them have been so strong. For the last 2 or 3 years I didn’t have these thoughts and I never had the desire to be in a relationship with a girl. But now my OCD is tricking me into thinking I did. I used to have girl crushes or be curious about things but for as long as I can remember since I was a little girl my dream was to always marry a boy. I know it’s going to take time and I’m not looking to get over it straight away but I’m just looking for advice on how to accept that this is just OCD? For some reason every time I try tell myself it isn’t real it’s just an intrusive thought my brain goes no you are just in denial. These thoughts are making me feel really ill any advice on how I can accept its OCD???

Sexual Orientation OCD

Francis

Date posted: 6y

It is difficult to break the cycle at first. The key is start allowing those thoughts to occur without you questioning them or trying to make yourself feel better. When they happen, try to let them flow through and even say things like, I might be attracted to girls, but that’s okay. You will feel very anxious at first, but the longer you continue, your anxiety will start to subside and the thoughts will seem silly.

Anonymous

Date posted: 6y

Hey, I have HOCD as well and it’s my only intrusive thought. I think I have other intrusive thoughts? But HOCD is the most noticeable and scary and convinced me that it isn’t OCD Because it’s my only OCD thought. So I feel relieved knowing I’m not the only person dealing with one OCD theme!! But ERP is super helpful and don’t dig into your past, it makes things worse!

Sunshine1

Date posted: 6y

Omg its my only theme too thought i was the only one ??‍♀️

Sunshine1

Date posted: 6y

Hang in there ladies we can get thru this ??

Anonymous

Date posted: 6y

Glad to know I’m not alone!

Francis

Date posted: 6y

It may be better to ease into exposing yourself so that you don’t overdo it. Your therapist can help you structure an exposure hierarchy so you can start small and work your way up. Hang in there! If it wasn’t OCD you wouldn’t be feeling so unwell and anxious!

Anonymous

Date posted: 6y

Yes, it does! I honestly can’t look at my past crushes anymore with ocd saying it wasn’t real

Lacy

Date posted: 6y

Definitely not alone girl ? We got this!

mktropeano

Date posted: 6y

wow this is absolutely identical to my HOCD. i had never had these thoughts before until one day i looked at my friend and thought that she was so pretty, because she is, and it went into a downward spiral from there. but therapy really helps. talking about it really helps. and there’s a lot of ups and downs, right now i’m kinda dealing with a down because it happens sometimes, but you have to just keep going. HOCD doesn’t have to be around forever, it can go away!!! i always feel like mine tricks me into thinking one thing and not the other, like it purposefully tries to get me to like certain things when i know i don’t. then i go into a cycle of in denial where it tells me i actually did like it i just won’t admit it. but i know that’s it’s just my ocd and not me, but learning to separate the two is hard

mktropeano

Date posted: 6y

this makes me feel so much better that so many people have commented on this and they deal w the same thing i do

ellen24

Date posted: 6y

Yes guys it makes me feel amazing to know I’m not alone. I know we are all going to be ok even though it’s tough now??

ellen24

Date posted: 6y

Exactly it makes me feel a lot better knowing other people go through this. Do you ever feel like your HOCD tricks you into remembering things differently? Or that you have feelings for someone? It’s so cruel!

ellen24

Date posted: 6y

Yeah it’s a great feeling to know we aren’t alone

Anonymous

Date posted: 6y

If anyone wants, im in a group with other girls dealing with HOCD, ROCD, etc. on Instagram. Add me @nadselhag and I can add anyone to the group!

Anonymous

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 24w

Pls I need advice

I’ve had so many moments of clarity with my OCD that I love my boyfriend and I’m beyond willing to go through this to be better and be with him. in the back of mind I’ve in a way known I was at least somewhat sexually attracted to women (I’m a woman) since the start of the ocd it was always like “okay. Fine, but I don’t want to date a girl” I only just realized this after the ocd started, I never really argued with this. my ocd has always revolved around if I’m romantically interested in women and not men. I’ve done so many compulsions through this year and a half and 9 times out of 10 have come to the conclusion that I don’t want to be with a woman romantically. I always end up feeling like I know I love my boyfriend. But the doubts don’t stop about whether I want to spend my life with a woman instead, my heart literally breaks to think of not being with my bf and imagining him with someone else. I don’t want to be with a woman I know deep down somewhere underneath the anxiety that that’s not what I want. It doesn’t feel natural for me, unfulfilling. I want to tell my boyfriend about the possible sexual attraction to women (ik it’s still ocd related) but I’m scared that once I tell him, I’ll realize that I actually do want to be with women and not with him. Ugh I’ve spent hours today ruminating about this after being solid in my commitment with him for a little while, I’m stuck in this loop and idk how to get out right now

Elliesmith

Date posted: 21w

Is this a symptom of soocd

I’m 25 and never ever thought this before my soocd relapse. I have a bf of 5 years. Never been a high libido kinda girl. Don’t get me wrong I do get turned on by my bf but not like every day you know? - That had always been in the back of my head, is this normal and ok? But my ocd has latched onto the most scariest what if EVER. My brain is now saying How do you know you won’t prefer to sleep and kiss girls if you haven’t tried it: and it’s that unknown that is scaring the shit out of me. I DONT AND NEVER HAVE wanted to sleep / kiss a girl. But now my intrusive thoughts is all I think about!!! I don’t want I don’t want I don’t want??? So why does my brain think BUT WHAT IF??? I know ocd thrives off uncertainty which is why I think this is happening? But I don’t wanna find out or work it out because all I want is to be with my bf and marry him!! Is this just the epitome of OCD?

Mt2019

Date posted: 19w

Question about HOCD

Sorry long post. Anyone feel like now they’re just in extreme denial. Like when I was little I noticed guys more than girls in movies and was more drawn to them. I remember changing my mindset to switch that. 98%of my life has been straight until recently. I felt drawn to some guys but never thought of it sexually. Always had girl crushes dreams and porn. Now I watch porn and I feel like straight takes longer and then I go and watch gay porn and feel nothing until I tell myself it’s two attractive dudes and love is love and imagine physical sensations and then it hits like suddenly. Like I have to convince myself it’s alright. Then when I try again I can do all that but feel nothing and then straight porn works. Idk if it’s just getting a fix or the first time works with anything or what but it’s confusing. On top of that I’ve felt girl relationships including my wife maybe miss something and a guy maybe matches that feeling that but then I feel like I’d be missing something without a girl or my wife. Idk I’ve had some rough times in life with male figures in my life but idk. I feel like I have to convince myself more and more that I’m straight even more than the first time I dealt with this. Can someone relate? Please

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