- Date posted
- 5y
- Date posted
- 5y
Distance is often difficult for people in relationships. Think about long distance relationships: the first thing people say about them most of the time is how hard they are. Support each other in whatever way you can. And remind each other that it’s okay if you’re both frustrated with the distance right now or feeling out of sync with each other. Things can improve again once this is over. In the meantime, this is a great opportunity to improve communication. Talk about the needs you both have and which of them aren’t being met. Brainstorm how you can change that or at least provide compassion and understanding for each other about those unmet needs for the time being.
- Date posted
- 5y
thank u so much! it’s harder when u have rocd because simple things can often turn into catastrophic thinking and make u feel like ur whole relationship is falling apart when it’s rlly not and everything is normal.
- Date posted
- 5y
Im so late to this but I go to college in a different state while my boyfriend works in our hometown. We are a bit used to the distance but its still hard. Distance really does make the heart grow fonder and we always said that the day we got to see each other again would make all the waiting worth it. The best thing we ever did was schedule calls. We would both be busy during the day so at 9pm we facetime and play games on our phones (imessage games) with each other and talk about our days. Communication can be be hard but as long as you make time to talk to each other and try and find little things to do together, like Netflix party mode or playing games and talking, you will be just fine! At the end of the day if you have real feelings for someone you can get through times like this together! and its okay to question things or overthink and worry so long as you’re communicating that. I have thoughts like that all the time but my boyfriend knows how my brain works and he can help give a little extra reassurance. So just be open and talk about your thoughts good or bad!
- Date posted
- 5y
It’s normal ❤️ my partner and I haven’t seen each other for months bc of this and we fought a lot more at the start too. It’s harder to feel affection when you can’t touch/kiss/etc. Do you ever feel scared that quarantine is gonna make you fall out of love? That’s my fear. Stay strong, and remember that this will pass and we will all find relief someday if we stick through it!
Related posts
- Date posted
- 14w
Hey everyone. I hope you all are doing okay. I’m currently struggling in the worse way I have through the course of my relationship. We are doing long distance right now, and I am unfortunately in the worse place I have been in. The uncertainty is absolutely unbearable. He is doing a cool new, consuming job 7 hours a way. He loves it, but I fear him loving the job so much that he stops caring about me. I have definitely noticed a shift in the amount of time he texts me and the energy he can give to the relationship. The job actually started off with 2 weeks of no phone. He has it again now though. We saw each other a couple of days ago in person for the last time we would in about two months. I was okayish when we were in person though I knew I would spiral later. And spiral I did. He left and I broke down. I am worried I will lose him. I start a really intensive EMT program in a week. It will be all-consuming for me. I can’t sleep very much and I don’t feel like eating. I know it’s pathetic. I am constantly consumed by these fears. I think I know what I need to do to combat them. Accept uncertainty but it feels like the possibly of it ending feels more real than ever. And I literally can NOT stop thinking about it. My brain feels in danger!!! I just worry that bad stuff is actually happening. I think we are going through a rough patch, but I also just feel more alone than ever. Drowning in my mind. What do I believe? I have a past of ocd, so it wouldn’t be surprised if it’s getting intertwined. Most people would say: it’s okay to ask him for reassurance about the relationship!!! But I feel like that’s the trap for me. I don’t know how to move forward. I know things are tough for us right now. But I’ve been floating back and forth on a spectrum of well maybe I just have trust to maybe this literally won’t work out!!! Texting and communicating over text is really hard for me. I am constantly analyzing it: how much energy is he giving? How much energy am I giving? Well I don’t want to do all the emotional labor, and be the main texter. But I also don’t care about texting that much and get exhausted with this back and forth.
- Date posted
- 13w
okay so i know that my boyfriend gets busy and i am usually checking my phone ALL THE TIME. like i am just that kind of person. but sometimes my boyfriend doesn’t reply to me for a bit and it makes me sad. he lags a lot, and it makes me mad when he doesn’t reply for a long time. we text and stuff but he doesn’t text me as much as he used to. and it stresses me out and i worry that it’s a red flag, or if it’s my OCD telling me to worry about it. i am the kind of person to say “actions speak louder than words “ and ive said that to him multiple times and he says he’s gonna work on things. it’s not like he doesn’t text me AT ALL, he texts me good morning everyday it’s just the lagging that makes me upset. so, is it my OCD telling me to worry about it or is it actually a concern?
- Date posted
- 6w
I’ve dealt with ocd themes for as long as I can remember, POCD, HOCD, false memory, the feelings of having to confess something, washing certain body parts a specific amount of times, all of it I am still pretty young and I just got into my first relationship. I always knew ROCD existed I just never had the chance to have an experience with it 😭 and here I am. I really do think I have an anxious attachment style. But it’s also like I constantly worry if I’m too much or if i should not be in a relationship or if I rlly love my partner like I tell him. I am sensitive and very communicative so when things bother me I like to communicate them but then I worry that I do too much or I worry that it isn’t normal to find this many things wrong so early in a relationship. I also worry if he doesn’t like me or if he Will get tired of me, but those thoughts are easier to get by. The hard thoughts r the ones where I doubt my feelings for him. My mind feels like a MESS! And it’s harder because we only see eachother once a week. This may be heaven compared to other ppl who struggle with real long distance but for me the time in between gives me a lot of time to nitpick things that aren’t even real problems and create a sense of a toxic relationship that isn’t even real! The only times where I feel like maybe it’s all in my head are when. I see him and the days after, but when it gets long it gets rlly hard. I rlly do love him and he gives me reassurance when needed but I can’t help but focus on the negatives when little things bother me, especially when we are apart from eachother and jsut texting. Texting is hard because then there is the obsession over waiting to see how long he will take, not knowing the tone of texts, and being able to over analyze every conversation we’ve had. I also do mental checks to help me reassure myself that I love him 😭 like when’s the last time he made me laugh, what are some nice things he’s done that I rlly liked, and jsut trying to actively acknowledge everything he’s done so I can stop panicking abt the fear that I don’t love him. It’s literally only been 2 months of us dating so the fact my ocd is so early onset annoys me so bad because I rlly do feel like I am still in the crucial stages of a relationship where we are learning how to love eachother, so there should be some ups and downs and minor arguments while we get over this phase… but I can’t help but wonder what if these little things just mean I hate him? It’s extreme but I worry and the reels and tik toks I see about people realizing they don’t love their partner make it all bad!
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