i just did about 40mins of erp scrolling through tiktok watching bisexual videos and boy am i triggered. i noticed myself doing sneaky compulsions tho. for example: the tiktok was like “if you liked these characters when you were young then you’re definitely bisexual” and they’d show the characters for example prince eric and ariel and i remember when i was young how obsessed i was with prince eric like i wanted to full blown marry him and i’d always pretend i was ariel. so then my sneaky compulsion was “you see you’re straight you only liked eric” but this one tiktok almost made me cry and i freaked out because i was overthinking why i almost cried: it was this guy talking about how he was straight his whole life until 2016 where he wasn’t sure and now he’s bi and when i tell you my heart fell to my stomach i wanted to cry but i didn’t i just say with the anxiety the thing is i know you’re not suppose to stop until the anxiety goes down but my anxiety didn’t go down at all it’s rose a lot. like every tiktok i saw it just got higher and higher. am i doing something wrong?

trigger warning maybe so idk who knows andrea russett but she’s a youtuber and she just posted a video coming out saying she’s bisexual and it triggered me soooo much. like i’m so scared that i am when i literally have never felt attraction to a girl at all like that. any time i think a girl is pretty i automatically jump to that conclusion now. and i always have to check and look at her butt to see if i’m attracted to it. like social media makes it all worse too. i almost do it out of habit now which makes me hate myself for it bc i’m mistaking it w attraction but when i try to tell myself it’s just ocd my brain tries to twist it into thinking that i’m actually bi!!! it just sucks and i’m so stressed about it

I was trying really hard not to like google incessantly and go on Reddit and stuff but I caved and I went down this rabbit hole of watching tik toks of women coming out and like comparing/contrasting my experiences with them. How do you stop yourself from doing these things? Especially when it feels like you have to watch the videos in order to like, “figure it out” and whatever. SO-OCD is SO HARD especially when sexuality is so fluid anyway. It’s so frustrating!!

I wanted to look up videos of how to recover from Bi sexual ocd but it’s a theme I struggled w back in 2018 and it went away and ever since i was living my life and now it’s back … literally went from harm ocd to bisexual ocd and now I’m getting extreme false attraction and groinal responses. And I saw a TikTok girl saying she had intrusive thoughts about being a lesbian and she came out as lesbian 4 years later and I just can’t stop sobbing. I don’t wanna be attracted to girls I’m sorry. Nothing against them but I feel grossed and can’t accept it. I can’t even do erp because I cannot accept these thoughts. My third time w this theme- what if I’m in denial? Can someone please help me overcome this??