How do you know, despite all the lack of feelings or strange feelings and thoughts you have, if it’s still rOCD or already you falling out of love?

You can't know for sure. Certainty is an illusion. You make your best guess and then act accordingly

Why do you have to use feelings or strange feelings as a proof you are falling out of love? If you argue with the one you love and get thoughts and feelings against him/her, it doesn't mean you don't love that person. Love is highly complicated and can't be sorted out like the way we try to. It's better for things to just happen of their own, in the way they are made to, when you're in love.

Love is a verb, it's something you do. Whether you don't feel anything because your brain has adapted to the anxiety of the thoughts or because you just simply don't, it doesn't need to say anything. Feelings or lack of them are never wrong or bad. They don't always make sense. Rather than compulsively checking your feelings and trying to draw conclusions to them, resolve to continue to treat your partner well and to do enjoyable things together etc and have the life you want. Relationships aren't 24/7 obsessive infatuation feelings, feelings always get back to your normal baseline eventually. Sometimes you want to punch them in the face, sometimes you're so preoccupied with other issues that you barely notice you're in a relationship. If I were in a relationship and decided to think about breaking up and didn't have a panic attack from it about how desperately I need them, I wouldn't think that's a sign I don't love them. Frankly I'd think it's a good sign. All of us should be able to know that we'd be ok without our partners. It makes us better at setting healthy boundaries and continuing to work on our own self esteem not based on being in a relationship. Some couples seem meld their personalities together so much that they're like some kind of two-headed hydra. They're always the most codependent couples. I don't think there can be anything wrong with being ok with the idea of not being with them but choosing to be with them because you simply want to. I'd even say it's preferable. I'd much, much rather have a partner who is just fine without be and chooses to be with me, than someone who thinks they need me, to fill a hole. I've been on dates with guys like that, they seemed to fall in love with who they imagined I was before getting to know me, and brush aside anything which went against their image of me. Screw being on a pedestal. It's creepy. Rant over