- Date posted
- 5y
- Date posted
- 5y
I’ve been dating my boyfriend for over a year now and I waited a long time before telling him about my OCD bc, of course, my OCD made me irrationally fear telling him about it. What has tremendously helped me to open up about my mental health to others is seeing my therapist, as she helped me realize that all my fears are just thoughts and that it really isn’t impossible to overcome them. So she encouraged me to talk to others more openly about my OCD, which I was terrified about doing bc I thought that if I mentioned my obsessions to others then they would be jinxed and just worsen my OCD, but what I found in telling those around me is that I just felt so much more free. My boyfriend was the first person (besides my therapist) who I talked to openly about all my main triggers and obsessions and he has been nothing short of understanding and supportive. He really cares so much about my well being and has never judged me for having this illness. Any fears that you may have about your OCD impacting your future relationships through judgement is just your OCD trying to trick you, but once you open up more about it, you will be able to gain the upper hand over it.
- Date posted
- 5y
I told my girlfriend about my harm OCD thoughts. She knows the general nature, but we don’t get into the nittty gritty. It hasn’t caused any issues and we even make inside jokes about it. I think people can surprise you with their understanding. That said, we’d been together for a few years, it wasn’t like we were on a first date. That said, you could approach telling your partner in different ways. For me, sharing the fact that I have OCD in general is a must - it’s a part of me and in the midst of a lapse I’d want to be able to let my partner know. That said, you aren’t obligated to share the details (theme) with anyone, assuming you both agree that that is acceptable. Frankly, she may not care or even want to know the details! OCD may be trying to convince you that you need to share all the details with an intimate partner because otherwise you might be a liar, ingenuine, etc. (or something along those lines). In reality, it isn’t so black and white!
- Date posted
- 5y
When you find the right person they will never make you feel bad for the thoughts or even pressure you into telling them. My fiance has heard and seen me at my lowest with this and he still loves me. Someone will love you one day for everything that you have going on.
- Date posted
- 5y
I feel this big time :/ like this is a daily thought for me. I try to just be upfront with people I’m talking to romantically about my OCD. Communication is key! And at the end of the day, it comes down to finding the right person. If someone truly sees you and who you are they will see past your illness and work with you through it. You’re not an evil or mad person, your brain is jsut unfortunately wired a little differently which causes you to have obsessions and compulsions. Your obsessions/intrusive thoughts do not reflect who you really are
- Date posted
- 5y
With disclosing my OCD to anyone, I find it helpful to do it in multiple smaller conversations. I start with vague information and work my way to specifics. The more relaxed I am during conversations, the better they tend to receive the information. That means not introducing the subject during an OCD symptom flare. Here is a link to an article that has more suggestionshttps://iocdf.org/expert-opinions/expert-opinionsdear-loved-one-i-have-ocd-tips-for-individuals-and-family-members-about-disclosing-your-ocd/
Related posts
- Date posted
- 24w
So I’m really struggling to believe that anyone will want to be in a relationship with me and still love me when they find out about my pocd and intrusive thoughts. I am holding a belief no one can love me with this condition and they will be repulsed by me when they find out. I just don’t know how to shake that feeling and be brave enough to try and share with anyone I’m dating.
- Date posted
- 20w
So pretty much I’ve been dealing with intrusive thoughts my entire life, I had no idea could’ve been symptom of OCD until maybe a year ago , I have this fear right now that I don’t actually love my fiancé and I’m not attracted to men. I am attracted to men. Let me be clear. I’m not attracted to females. I never have been and I never will be. But it’s one of the scariest thoughts I’ve ever had that I don’t actually care about the person that I would sacrifice anything for that I would do anything for. He’s pretty much the closest family that I have and I just wanna be with him for the rest of my life. A couple months ago was that I just didn’t care at all, and I didn’t have any feelings and everything that I felt was me being fake in that nothing was real. But I eventually got over that and the new thought is that I’m actually gay even though I know I’m not. And in the world we live in now where it’s be yourself be you if it comes across your mind. That’s the obvious truth. Be yourself… It’s kind of scary to think about. I just want it to leave me alone. I’m actually so scared that eventually I’ll believe it because some thoughts that I’ve learned were intrusive. I ended up starting to believe and it turned into a whole catastrophe for my life. I met this girl and she felt a certain way about her husband and then she told me that eventually I’ll feel that way and ever since then I just I haven’t gotten over this fear that I’m gonna end up feeling the same way she is. Also, I recently got over a few themes. I’m not ready to share, but I’m so proud that I got over those and I just I’m waiting for this one to leave me alone and it’s not and I’m starting to get really scared that it’s true and I don’t want it to be true. and just to be very clear I don’t care who you love what you love who you like what you identify as because you can in fact be yourself but this just doesn’t feel like me. I’m genuinely reaching out to try to get help for this because now it’s messing with our personal life. We’ve never argued so much in our entire relationship and now I realize that it’s mainly my fault because I’m detaching myself from all emotion just so that I can get over this thought I’m detaching myself from all intimacy and that’s even scarier because what if it’s not me detaching myself and it’s me just not being attracted that’s another thought I’ve hadI’ve gone all long enough so thanks.
- Date posted
- 12w
I have intrusive thoughts all the time. I married the wrong woman, she’s not right for me, I don’t feel right with her, I’m going to fail at work, I’m going to lose my job, what if I can’t sleep at night, I can’t sleep at night, what if my surgery doesn’t work, what will people think of me, I’m a failure, I let people down, I’m a horrible father, my son hates me, do I or don’t I drink coffee, what if I eat the wrong foods, there’s something wrong with me physically all the time, etc, etc, etc. It’s extremely annoying and exhausting. I just can’t wait to go to bed at night and try to fall asleep to shut off my brain.
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