When reading about how to manage OCD, some books say that, when you get an intrusive thought, just say “it’s not important.” However, if you use ERP, you dwell on the thought, feel the anxiety, thereby giving it some importance. Are these just two different ways to manage OCD?

Skeptical about ERP? I found ERP really conflicts with some other theories, like the theories of Louise Hay (who wrote the book “you can heal your life). I will elaborate on my confusions. 1. ERP asks us to experience obsessions without thinking “no I won’t hurt myself” “no I won’t hurt others”. “No, I am safe and those thoughts are not real”. Thinking “i won’t do dangerous stuff and I am completely safe” is considered as compulsion to rid us of anxiety, but Louise Hay thinks it as positive affirmation. 2. Will ERP make us believe what we think even more? ERP asks you to write your fears into those stories and scripts and repeat them again and again until you habituate. But why would I say to myself “oh, maybe I will kill my parents and I will accept that and move on”? How does this make any sense? 3. I read the book of Shannon Shy who has recovered from OCD and he used his own strategies. I remembered that when he confronted his obsession of whether he left the pot on, he would say to himself that “do you think the pot will turn itself on”? to help him better move on to do things that he should do. But according to ERP, isn’t this a compulsion? Cuz ERP asks us to accept that ok the pot may be on and my house may be burned down and I accept that and I move on? I just find ERP theories weird.

I'm really confused about what ERP actually is. I've read that it's all about facing your intrusive thoughts & not doing the compulsions, but then I also hear it's about more than that, like eating off a toilet seat, or even licking a toilet seat. So I guess my question is if ERP is really about letting my intrusive thoughts be there and not reacting to them, whats the point of doing far-out-there exposures that would bother be OCD or no OCD. I could lick toilets, eat from them, roll around in dumpsters, make things opposite from the way I want them all day, but I'm still not going to like doing those things. It's weird because the description of ERP seems to contradict things when it's actually put into practice.

One for the therapists or those that have done ERP or followed some of the advice on here.... If the best way to deal with the intrusive thought is to not give it certainty and to say "that might happen, who knows?" then surely you're fuelling the thought which is going to heighten anxiety levels? For example if you have POCD and have a thought such as "What if I think sexual thoughts about that child?" and you sit with the thought saying to yourself "I might do, I might not" surely that's going to make you ruminate on it and we're told rumination is wrong. Or another example "I'm going to hurt myself later" and then thinking "maybe I will, I don't know" you're just going to make yourself worse? If there's a chance that thought is gonna come true it's make you feel worse surely? Please tell me if I'm wrong and I've got the wrong end of the stick here but it's been playing on my mind. Surely it's better to ignore the thought the entirely or just observe it as if to say haha yeah OK keep trying to tell me that, that's ridiculous. Advice and thoughts appreciated.