- Username
- hopeful4healing
- Date posted
- 4y ago
- Username
- FathomableFathomable
- Date posted
- 4y ago
Gotta stop investigating and ruminating over them. That gets easier over time. Treatment doesn't often bring you a confirmation that your relationship is perfect, but it works because your brain no longer needs it to be perfect. Thoughts mostly go bye-bye. Any that you do still get, you're able to let them pass by without investigation. You end up with a space of much more emotional freedom to be able to see that even if your relationship isn't perfect all the time, that doesn't make it a disaster or a threat. But you can't do treatment by arguing with the thoughts telling them they're not a disaster or a threat. Those deep emotional realisations can come naturally, after treatment where you process your anxieties by staying with the physical feelings instead of investigating them. Treatment can get you to a mature place of knowing that if something is wrong in the relationship you could work on solving it, and that flaws are not threats, so you can make decisions based on what you know instead of based on panic and rumination. The only thing that can forcibly take your relationship from you is OCD. I really recommend doing treatment.
- Username
- ItsOmarItsOmar
- Date posted
- 4y ago
My personal opinion is that it’s very natural to get bored and not want to spend time with him. Keep in mind that you’ll be very aware when something is wrong with the relationship and won’t need to be coming here to ask. We all get bored and it’s in fact very common for people who’ve been dating for a while to experience some sort of boredom while spending time together. But whether there’s something wrong in the relationship or not is totally something you would be able to figure out 100% without needing reassurance.
- Username
- Ditto~Ditto~
- Date posted
- 4y ago
I get confused on this too because it’s gotten to the point where my bf initiates all our intimate kisses. I am still affectionate in touch though. But I have a lot of guilt because I don’t care to show him attention as much anymore.
- Username
- Paula33Paula33
- Date posted
- 4y ago
I can relate... its tough to know what to believe. I think what ill do is just go with the flow instead of associating negativity to these things. Maybe the moment we stop judging these thoughts or realities, we will starr to understand better why we feel thus way for real?
Related posts
- Username
- Anonymous
- Date posted
- 5y ago
I’m off on holiday with my boyfriend for our first trip away together on Friday. I should be really excited (and a small part of me is) but another part is worried this might be the thing that pushes me over the edge and into ending the relationship. From past experience with friends, I get quite irritable and just switch off. Does anyone have any similar experiences and how did you deal with them? I’m also no longer ‘what if-ing’- just statements ‘you don’t love him’, ‘this is over’ and last night got some physical ‘dropping’ sensations in my stomach which made these thoughts feel real. I’ve found him generally really annoying this weekend which has made me sad because really, he’s not done anything. I had such fight and determination in me 2 months ago that my relationship was what I wanted but now I’m really struggling to feel this. Tips?
- Username
- crc_1394
- Date posted
- 2y ago
Why does it keep feeling better/right for me to leave my wonderful relationship? It feels more wrong and it hurts more at the thought of staying. I keep hearing in my brain I’m just with him bc I don’t want to be alone, but these thoughts and feelings are driving me crazy. I want to cocoon and be alone but of course I want to stay in this relationship. It’s like my brain doesn’t want to be convinced that I love him or want to stay with him. It’s like it only wants us to be alone so we’re no longer stressed about this stuff. I hate that’s how exhausted I am with all this shit😞any tips/help?
- Username
- Anonymous
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 48w ago
Weekend with my bf and it was ROLLERCOASTER:(
It’s so hard to deal with the conflicting feelings that come up. It’s hard but sometimes I’m able I to feel love for my bf again and want to continue being with him, I enjoy our intimacy and the bond we share, but my mind keeps screaming at me that something’s wrong and I don’t want to be with him 😭 that I wouldn’t be happy with him in the future even though everytime we’re together I never want to leave or have it be over. Everytime I try to envision myself with a woman the fact that’s there’s no anxiety and feels calm to think about is so scary to the fact that I’m anxious when I think about a future w my bf and it feels like it’s not what I want:(
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