- Date posted
- 6y
- Date posted
- 6y
She sounds immature and ignorant. I wouldn’t call someone like her a friend. A friend should never belittle and ridicule you. You don’t need someone negative in your life to make things worse for you. Negativity will affect your OCD for the worse. She thinks it’s something we choose to have. Tell her it’s a disorder. It’s something you can’t just “quit”. In a way it’s an addiction. We are addicted to doing our compulsions to get rid of the anxiety. If she had OCD, she wouldn’t even have the audacity to say “I’ll turn it off”. Someone like her really gets me angry. But seriously you deserve a better friend. She doesn’t understand and won’t even try to understand what you say. She’s not worth your friendship.
- Date posted
- 6y
You need supportive friends. People who will at least try to research and understand what you are going through. She’s not a friend.
- Date posted
- 6y
Well if she said you should go “cold turkey” with your OCD then I say you should go “cold turkey” with her. Lol we are here for you! You’re not alone in this battle. These things are only truly understandable by those who are affected by it. Maybe it’s a blessing in disguise. Losing a friend is hard but you will find and be surrounded by supportive peers. She actually sounds like my sister. She always had this motto of “I’m older than you so I don’t have to listen to you. I’m older so I know better” which is ironic because she had a very sheltered life. I knew she was bad to be around. And now She’s one less thing I need to stress over. You deserve a healthy environment in which you can get constructive support in treating your OCD. .
- Date posted
- 6y
This girl has a profound misunderstanding of what OCD is. However, it also does not seem like she wants to understand. I agree with the others that she is not a helpful person to associate yourself with. Perhaps you can describe getting rid of your compulsions as working out ?? a part of your mind. You have to build up muscles to override this mental error. It’s not your fault and it’s not going to change overnight. If possible, I would try to surround myself with more encouraging people because she seems to lack compassion for you.
- Date posted
- 6y
If I was a b-word I would just stop. :)
- Date posted
- 6y
I sometimes think of it as an idea which has fallen into the part of my brain other people save for survival or high-performance situations. Like if the ARMY was preparing for war against parking tickets.
- Date posted
- 6y
She’s not taking you seriously.
- Date posted
- 6y
Thank you, sometimes it helps to see it from a different perspective. You are right about her I think. I have tried to describe it as being like an addiction but she told me I should go ‘cold turkey’ and that it can’t be that difficult. I swear to god, I think she has an answer for everything! I’ll probably distance myself from her over the coming weeks. It is just disappointing because she was a good friend for so long but as soon as I told her I had a mental illness, she never acted the same around me. Thank you for you help though, I really appreciate it ☺️
- Date posted
- 6y
Thank you both, it is really helpful to know that I’m not overreacting!
- Date posted
- 6y
Nope, you’re not overreacting. If anything she’s undermining your suffering. We are here for you ❤️
- Date posted
- 6y
@DollarMustache I love your analogy!
- Date posted
- 6y
@DollarMusctache I love your analogy too! ☺️
Related posts
- Date posted
- 20w
So, I know my capacity to get fixated on things. And it's normally something that's relatively remote but, my latest issue is really getting to me and I was wondering if people have any advice. I'm avoiding getting too into specifics, as I don't want this to get reassurance-y but, in essence.. I came to the realisation recently that people who I'd been "friends" (feels like the wrong term now) when I was younger were not very nice people, and normalized a lot of very unpleasant behaviour towards other members of the group. They really normalized it, sold themselves as figures of authority, as older and more responsible and grown-up than others, and looking back, they acted horribly. And coming to this realisation, that I'd been manipulated into just accepting their behaviour has just... broken me. My OCD has latched onto it and I can't stop feeling irreversibly tainted by it. I've talked to others about it, and they've reassured me, told me it's not a big deal and that I hold myself to too high a standard, but none of that sticks. I feel better for a bit, then think 'Maybe when you told them you were skewing it to make yourself look better' or 'Did you leave out a crucial detail'. I keep ruminating over and over, trying to remember exactly how everything played out, trying to figure out if I fed into the behaviour, if I did something bad myself (because y'know, I feel like I was accepting of it at the time, so what does it say about my own values?). I know I need to stop doing all this if I want to improve, but then some part of me keeps saying 'So, you're just going to let yourself off the hook then?' Normally, I can rationalize my own fears to some degree, assure myself something won't happen, but the realness of the situation, and the fact I only came to understand the reality of it because the thought had been bothering me means it feels so much more all-encompassing. I know confessing in itself is a compulsion, but I keep feeling that if I'm not I'm somehow concealing what I 'really am' from others around me, and any positive interactions are me deceiving them in some way. I feel like I can't enjoy anything in life right now, and a good part of me feels I should not enjoy it ever again. If anybody has any advice on it, I'm all ears. Or even hearing if you relate to these feelings, I might appreciate the solidarity at least.
- Date posted
- 9w
My mom will sit and listen to me for quite a while, but she interrupts a lot and gets angry/upset. While I appreciate her passion, it's often stressful. Every time I come to her, if I even *mention* OCD, she gets frustrated and says, "Everyone deals with these issues, you know. It doesn't mean it's OCD." And I repeat, "I'm not saying my issues are unique — I'm saying the way I respond to them is a problem." But she just shakes her head and says, "Okay, I need to get back to my day." Full context, I'm an adult, and I live with my boyfriend, but I'm staying at my mom's for the next month. After living away from home for years, I went back to living with her during the pandemic, and I only recently left to live with him. Honestly, I think living with her for so long in my adulthood really messed with me and made me feel like a teenager all over again. I feel like my mental growth is stunted, and that's part of why my OCD is so bad lately. Not blaming, just noticing. She doesn't seem to understand how relieving the OCD diagnosis has been for me, because it explains so so so many things I've struggled with for years, and it's exciting to have more resources that can help me. But I think she sees it as me finding an excuse to *not* work on myself, which is just untrue. I'm not going to let OCD hold me back or use it as an excuse, but I'm also not going to pretend it's not a problem when I know it is — I was even diagnosed through NOCD. The whole point being to fix it, not use it as a crutch. When I have an issue, it's unbearable. Any issue, big or small, feels just the same. I feel a sinking feeling, my mind races, my heart beats out of my chest. I end up running to my support systems, crying, ruminating for days on end. Then, months later, the same exact issue can feel like nothing anymore, because it's no longer an obsession. I'm sure everyone deals with issues in a similar way, but I *know* there is something specific and debilitating going on with me. This is reassurance seeking, but in the face of being told I'm making a big deal out of nothing, can someone diagnosed with OCD tell me if they relate to the specific intensity of these feelings??
- Date posted
- 7w
Someone I care about has OCD, he often gets worried to answer certain things in fear that he might be wrong or gets anxious in times when certain conversations such as dealing with negative emotions come into play and in the event something goes wrong even though we deal with the issue it takes him a long time to put himself back together. Often times worried about his image, hyper focused on being a good person etc etc. I believe I’m doing my best but as someone who doesn’t struggle with OCD I cant fully comprehend him and i wish to learn more about it, not just read it off of google. Any advice would be appreciate it. -Thank you!
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