- Date posted
- 6y
- Date posted
- 6y
Okay so a few things BUT WELL DONE ON ERP: 1) don’t do it in a rush. ERP isn’t a sprint, it’s a marathon. If you do it quickly, it will fail 2) the ‘I’ll try that on a chick’ is a compulsion. Don’t compare. Just stare and let thoughts come in. 3) Arousal happens to any sexual stimulus gay or straight and has NO bearing on one’s sexual orientation.
- Date posted
- 6y
Nicky310- thanks for the help but now I’m curious. Does that mean I have to refrain from jacking off because all my life I jacked off to women or porn that’s just how I get off but since I have HOCD that’s a compulsion now right? Because I’ve already stopped looking at porn because it’s a compulsion but I guess I should’ve asked my psychologist if I should stop jacking off thinking about sex with women even though that’s what I’ve always done in my life but it’s seems you know a lot about this stuff too so I just thought I ask you thanks.
- Date posted
- 6y
I have a feeling that your thought of trying on a woman, is a form of distraction. It may not have been intentional but distraction can become avoidance.
- Date posted
- 6y
I know but I’ll try that on a chick was a thought that popped in seeing that it’s not like I was trying to think that but when I see that stuff I just start visualizing me with a chick not because I’m trying to suppress my thoughts but it just comes out of no where to where I start visualizing a chick like I can’t help it that’s just what’s started to happen though as I’m on day 4 of looking at pictures for erp and my psychologist said at first to just look at pictures of men but I told her that I was looking at naked dudes for my erp and she told me than to keep doing that until we meet again. My psychologist wants me to get my anxiety up again since I kind of messed myself up doing the self help on my own without any help so that’s where I’m at.
- Date posted
- 6y
Of course no problems ! You’re doing sooo well! Yeah I think refraining from it is best because it can be a reassurance, but check with your therapist!
Related posts
- Date posted
- 17w
Sorry long post. Anyone feel like now they’re just in extreme denial. Like when I was little I noticed guys more than girls in movies and was more drawn to them. I remember changing my mindset to switch that. 98%of my life has been straight until recently. I felt drawn to some guys but never thought of it sexually. Always had girl crushes dreams and porn. Now I watch porn and I feel like straight takes longer and then I go and watch gay porn and feel nothing until I tell myself it’s two attractive dudes and love is love and imagine physical sensations and then it hits like suddenly. Like I have to convince myself it’s alright. Then when I try again I can do all that but feel nothing and then straight porn works. Idk if it’s just getting a fix or the first time works with anything or what but it’s confusing. On top of that I’ve felt girl relationships including my wife maybe miss something and a guy maybe matches that feeling that but then I feel like I’d be missing something without a girl or my wife. Idk I’ve had some rough times in life with male figures in my life but idk. I feel like I have to convince myself more and more that I’m straight even more than the first time I dealt with this. Can someone relate? Please
- Date posted
- 11w
I’ve completely lost myself. I can’t focus on my studies, I can’t go to the gym. Dang it I can’t even be around my male friends normally anymore. I got no idea why or how this happened but the only thing I know for sure is that I never questioned my sexuality neither doubted it. I never cared in general. I just liked girls. I keep testing and keep testing and keep testing my arousal but no matter how many times I see but I don’t feel the same way for guys that I do with girls my mind will always try to make me believe that I am gay. It’s like it’s forcing me into an identity I never asked for. But at the end of the day like my psychologist told me. Sexuality doesn’t change. So since I never felt anything for guys in my life it’s ocd. I’ve been up and down for 5 months now and while the last week I was feeling way better. Monday now and I’m back to zero. I just want to go back when everything was normal. I can’t keep living with this.
- Date posted
- 11w
Like I can’t think straight. This is making me doubt everything I’ve thought about myself and even makes me feel like I like the thoughts when I know I don’t. Like I would be less anxious at a time while I still have the thoughts and my mind would go “oh so you like it you must be gay” or the other one where I’m not anxious and I think of my attraction for girls that I’ve had my whole life and my mind goes “see now you’re not into them you’re gay” like it’s so stupid but so effective. I clearly remember being into girls my whole life but my mind is making me believe that all these attractions and feelings for women were all fake or “a thing of the past”. But I can still get aroused by women but I have this weird anxiety going on which brings these sensations/feelings and it’s so weird. Today I’ve spent my whole day thinking about it like I’ve been doing for 5 months now. I know that this aint normal but my mind just won’t let me live in peace. I never cared about my sexuality cuz I simply liked women my whole life but now my sexuality is a fundamental philosophy. I hate this.
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