freaking out because i can’t tell the difference between liking male attention vs. actually liking a man. whenever a guy i like likes me back, i become totally turned off and even grossed out. liking women doesn’t sound or feel right either..... but it’s just so torturous feeling like i don’t know my “true” self, or that i could be this far in denial. i don’t want to have to constantly question and doubt and analyze and “check” anymore. i’m so exhausted. nothing feels right. i’m so jealous of people who never have to stress about this. i also don’t get why the thought of being a lesbian is legitimately gut-wrenching and TERRIFYING. it shouldn’t be a big deal, but my brain blows it way out of proportion every time. i wish i could just have certainty. i just want to feel normal; or like i’m not somehow lying to myself. sorry for the rant; just wanted to express my thoughts to people who might understand.

@minimjs Do you wanna do Instagram? Mine is @kylee.m.toland

@minimjs Yeah of course!!

I understand where you are coming from, but I also get her point as well. I just recently had the same issue after two weird experiences with guys I get nervous when a guy likes me back and feel a sickening sense in my stomach. It sucks because this really feeds into the OCD factor

@tolandkm I have Hocd as well, I get where she coming from to, when you look at the same sex do you feel anxiety but it’s like a concerned feeling because that’s not attraction because when I look at the opposite I like it and want to look again but with same sex I look again to check and check and anxiety builds and if there’s gronial it makes it worst. With the groin when you want one you don’t and when you don’t you do

@10lewis10 I don’t like looking at the same sex because it does make me nervous that I am gay. I do enjoy looking at the opposite sex, but I am sometimes reminded of my intimacy issues and feel sad about how I can’t just be like everyone else, so that’s why right now my libido is so low for men.

@tolandkm So to answer your question, I don’t want to like the same sex, but liking the opposite sex now is hard for me because of being a shy person.

@tolandkm Same here your sex drive decrease because your body is in a scared mode. Don’t you see we all have the answer we enjoy the opposite that’s the evidence, we are all expecting this massive realisation that we’re gay or bi but we would enjoy it and won’t question it. People in denial know they like it but deny it but with us we are searching to see we like it but we can’t find that and that’s why we struggle. Best way to think of it is ocd arguing with you sexuality

@10lewis10 Yeah you are right. I think one thing that bugs me is that sometimes I get so excited to see my best friend (female) that my stomach feels anxious. I’m not attracted to her, I just have a love her in a platonic way. But OCD makes me think that I am in love with her and that freaks me out. Could we maybe talk through DMs? I would love to talk more

@tolandkm Yh sure thing

@10lewis10 Wanna do Instagram?

@tolandkm Mine is @kylee.m.toland

@tolandkm Yh what’s yours

But overthinking is litteraly what ocd is about