- Date posted
- 5y
- Date posted
- 5y
First of all... take a deeeeeep breath. Happy birthday!!! things like that happen.. trust me I’ve blurted some things while drunk which is why I typically don’t like drinking anymore - also because I get horrible “hangxiety” (only three years older than you). Don’t keep apologizing if he didn’t take it personally - coming from personal experience with my own boyfriend. It’s hard because when you’re drunk you’re not aware of your behavior and can’t apply things you’ve learned in cognitive therapy etc. you’re human. take a nice shower, cup of tea, put on a funny comedy, and avoid looking for external validation (it’s not long lasting). Sleeping it off and drinking water is the best thing to do right now. Sending love cus I’ve been there but you will come through it and if he loves you he’ll understand too!
- Date posted
- 5y
Thank you so much for your advice, I really appreciate it! I will go do those things and just practice self compassion. It’s tough but I won’t let this get me down. I hope you have a great day :) and thank you as well for the birthday wishes!
- Date posted
- 5y
Journaling also REALLY helps. I try to catch my thoughts. I would suggest looking up the DBT thought log on google (it explains how to use it). I don’t know how long you’ve been in a relationship before but mine was very triggering in the beginning - not because of him- but because of my relationship ocd. That with drinking could at times send me off the rail. Consider yourself lucky if that’s all you did on your 21st!!! Self compassion and forgiveness is huge and if your boyfriend is supportive lean into that and be vulnerable (brene brown is a must listen).
- Date posted
- 5y
Sounds like it was pretty harmless, but I understand having anxiety about it. Drinking heavily usually doesn’t yield good results no matter single or in a relationship
Related posts
- Date posted
- 21w
Has anyone else experienced something like this? I’m graduating from college soon and i have been so stressed about finding a job, signing a lease for an apartment, college ending, I have an ungodly amount of assignments to do, I have a tumultuous relationship with my mother that has recently blown up again, and so much more. I am just so overwhelmed, I snapped at my boyfriend last night. I immediately apologized but i still feel awful. One of my biggest fears is being an abusive partner and i feel like this confirms that I am one. My best friend was also there and he saw me snap at my boyfriend and I’m scared he thinks I’m awful too. He saw me apologize so maybe that makes him think differently, but i can’t know for sure. The logical side of me tells me it’s not that deep, i apologized, and it’s time to move on. But i feel like i need to apologize to my best friend too to make sure he doesn’t think im terrible, but i know thats reassurance seeking. The ocd in me is punishing myself and refusing to move on.
- Date posted
- 21w
I told my boyfriend last night about all the times that I thought I “cheated” (I have ROCD) on him and he said that I didn’t but he still feels uncomfortable about it and I can tell he’s not answering me and he’s being really dry and his responses. He said it was fine but now I don’t know what to do because I know it’s not fine. I didn’t cheat on him, but I felt like I did and I told him that and I think it made him really uneasy. I just don’t wanna lose him and I’m scared because I had a dream about it and he got really mad and broke up with me. I didn’t want to tell him what I was going through in the first place, but it was eating at me so badly with the guilt I had to confess. I don’t know what is wrong with me, but I cannot lose him.
- Date posted
- 12w
So I have been struggling with the same theme of ocd for 4 months now. My ocd centers around past events/false memories that ocd skews to make seem bad or it twists my thoughts on what my intentions were. this is related to cheating or being weird while I have been in my amazing relationship. I have never cheated on my partner and never will and I believe it is wrong. But my ocd is telling me other wise. I love my partner so very much and I would never want to hurt him but my brain is getting to me. I was getting better. I was trying “maybe I did, maybe I didn’t”, I have been back on meds and in therapy and I stopped confessing random interactions from years/months ago about 1.5 weeks ago and it really helped. But now I woke up this morning and feel the pit in my stomach again. I feel extra critical and like why would you do this? What does this say about you? What was your intention with this? And I’m just stuck mentally reviewing and ruminating on everything you could imagine. I know my personality and I know in the moment maybe I did find them attractive but mainly I was just being nice or funny or even just a good friend, but looking back now I’m like “was it flirting?” “Why did I still snap this person” “why would I even talk to them” and stuff like that. I feel this intense sense of guilt. I have told my partner everything that I keep getting stuck on and he didn’t care, he said he understands or “that’s a little weird but it’s okay” and hasn’t missed a beat. He said eveything I’ve told him is normal and I’ve heard that from my friends too. I just really need help. I don’t know what to do anymore. I am so disappointed because I thought I was gonna be done with this, so why am I still so worried and caught up in this.
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