TW pedophilia I know you lot aren’t professionals, but I need serious advice. In the past I would imagine myself doing sexual things with a teenager to see how I would feel and generally I would go “ew no”, but now it feels like I would. I’m worried that I would do things with a teenager when just a few days ago I would have told my brain that I absolutely would not because I’m not attracted to them. I know false attraction is a thing. I feel like my brain has taken “pedophiles feel good about their pedophilia and since you experience anxiety about it you don’t” and made it into “now you don’t feel anxiety and maybe you’d enjoy it”. I don’t want this. It fee unrealistic that I would make such a 180 in under 24 hours, but I feel convinced that I am a pedophile. I don’t know what to do and my appointment isn’t until the week after next. I just want some insight to see if anyone has heard of this phenomena or experienced it themselves.

POCD

Anonymous

Date posted: 5y

If you feel uncomfortable with it then chances are it is the OCD. Paedophiles do not feel guilty and actively look to for fill their desires for their own gain with no regard to the child they inflict the pain upon. Thoughts do not equal reality and this is what OCD does, it tries to twist it so you think you ARE a paedophile, or this that and the other. And it’s good at doing it too, but you CAN get through this.

9jewels

Date posted: 5y

That’s the thing. In the past, even just over a day ago, I would feel disgust at the idea of harming or touching a child/teenager. I don’t even like interacting with teenagers/minors in any capacity if it can be helped. But as of yesterday it feels like a complete 180, like maybe I would enjoy it or that it wouldn’t be bad. I feel more numb than anything. My friends tell me “well pedophiles feel good about it” so maybe my brain makes me feel good about it to line up with that idea. I feel numb/neutral to it in the worst way. Now I’m questioning if my attraction to adults has been fake this whole time.

Ben84

Date posted: 5y

First, I'd just point out that pedophilia refers to being primarily attracted to pre-adolescent children. The definition doesn't include teens and also doesn't include molestation. People tend to use the word incorrectly. Having said that, OCD generally doesn't care about facts anyway. Having thoughts and feelings isn't a crime even though it can feel like it. Ultimately you have to sit with the uncertainty and live out your values ☺.

Tidbits1192

Date posted: 5y

Sounds like you’re having a backdoor spike. Those are basically feeling anxious about not feeling anxious about something. I get them sometimes, kind of have one right now about the same topic. My anxiety has been a lot more than usual and I think right now it’s just tired out from worrying.

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