Someone talk

i’ve woken up crying once from a dream i think. but i keep having same sex dreams and i wake up super anxious.

it’s so annoying :( i’ve never had a same sex dream in my life until this shit started

@holley I’m honestly relieved a bit because I’m not the only one who experienced it which is why I have so much doubt in my head because I know that’s not what I like I didn’t enjoy it at all after that experience That’s when I decided to reach out to a therapist my appointment is going to be coming up soon I don’t feel the same anymore in other words I felt like I was violated and I hate feeling like that

@luiscoro0218 well i’m glad you reached out! everyone deserves to get better.

@holley Nobody in my family knows nor my friends because it’s an embarrassing topic and I don’t want them to say that I’m gay but I know I’m not deep down I know I’m not I don’t say that I’m straight and then do gay things Because if that were true then it would be considered denial and that’s one thing that I know I’m not in denial I haven’t been lucky with the ladies but I’ve had three girlfriends in my life and had crushes on girls as well and just a year ago my ex girlfriend/fiancée left me and I’ve been down in the dumps because of that situation and then a month ago is when my HOCD came into a impact

@luiscoro0218 i’m sorry to hear about that ! i have been dating my boyfriend for about 4 months now and i love him and know i am attracted to him, there’s physical evidence...about 2 months ago i got an intrusive thought about this girl i didn’t even like and the thought told me to tell her i did and then i did even though i didn’t like her and it that thought went away but then directly after that thought went away i had thoughts that went “you are gay” “break up with your boyfriend” “you aren’t attracted to him” i’ve always had crushes on guys growing up, when i think of these thoughts like (and i’ve had them before) i feel anxious and like the impulse is there to tell him or to “come out” but i want to marry him!! the other day i almost broke up with him because the thoughts were so intense. and we plan to get engaged in september and i’m doubting my relationship and doubting so much if i love him and i know i do! sometimes i cry when we become intimate and stuff and feel guilty and then i think am i really straight and life doesn’t feel real and i think about this stuff ALLLLL day every day it’s exhausting. i’ve always been confused about my sexuality and feeling bad about it, i had a thing for only one girl last year and inside i always felt like it was “wrong” inside does that make sense? and so after that i’ve only dated guys, and i’m dating my boyfriend rn . and so back in january i touched this girl, it didn’t really make me happy a lot of negativity came out of it and i started yk questioning stuff then i dated my boyfriend in february, late february and it was all good until 2 months ago then i had this intrusive thought about this girl that i never liked at all

When you day groinal , can that be a full on erection

Has it ever made think you like the thoughts

IT is sad guys, it is difficult, but you have to overcome it i also have to over come it too.

@rri3004 It is very sad I cut social media completely because of it I’ve also closed down my dating apps as well all of that stuff was giving me heavy anxiety and panicI lost who I was I felt like the old me died