I really don’t care anymore about being gay I give up. at first this gave my chronic depression and everyday I’d wake up I would wish I never did cause it was so bad, I’d wait hours just to back to sleep. but that was about 2 months ago these thoughts have done exactly what I feared they do I’m not scared of being gay anymore and I have no resistance to it, now someone could ask me do “I wanna be gay?” And obviously I would tell them no not a chance I wanna go back to my old me. But saying that now it just feels like I’m lying to myself. I’ve lost my normal self, and can’t even think ab my friends normally anymore or any male for that matter, it feels like I don’t wanna get better and that this isn’t ocd at all and I’m just turning I DONT GET IT AT ALL my whole life I’ve been into girls dreamt about my future wife and it feels like I’ve had that all stripped away from me I hate posting about this shit cause I feel like I’m the only person going through this who is in the end actually gunna realize they are what they fear and I have no resistance to it anymore.

And deep down people know who they are, they know they are straight too me I don’t know I’ve never got aroused by a man or gay porn but I feel like I’m attracted to some dudes where a year ago I probably wouldn’t of thought twice about them. I just feel like it’s ocd and I also feel like it isn’t either I really don’t know anymore and I’m not even interested in girls anymore at all I’ve lost everything

@Tyler11 I’m going through all of this right now, this is fully happening to me check out my posts, also do u imagine gay situations when u are aroused to see if u like it, and it feels like u like it

@frghtfdfh Yeah I really try and not be sexually at all I fucking hate it cause everytime I do try and masturbate I get intrusive thoughts

@Tyler11 We are all here for you man I go through the same shit. I’ve been with my girlfriend for 4 years and before HOCD I was so happy and dreamt all the time of marrying her and having an awesome relationship and family which always made me so happy but now bc of HOCD I feel like my whole future is fucked up cuz I hate these damn thoughts and shit

@No_brainier99 What OCD do you have? If u don’t mind me asking

@No_brainier99 I was just curious cuz u mentioned you were gay and I’m wondering do you have OCD about being straight?

@No_brainier99 Oh maybe I read it wrong hahah cuz you said below “I found out when I was 18, I chased girls my whole life and then discovered I was gay” and then you talked about how everyone still accepted you. Idk I was just curious your perspective from a different view but maybe I read that wrong hahah

I agree here, I do believe however that there are very few people who are 100 percent straight or whatever they claim they are and it’s a spectrum, but if your straight your on the straight spectrum and if your gay your on that side of the spectrum. I don’t think it’s that easy to just cross right over if that makes sense

@Anonymous Yeah exactly I’ve always believed myself to be on the straight spectrum and now I suddenly switched over it makes no sense at all

@Tyler11 I feel u man trust me ur not the only one who feels like that I wish I could just turn back time and be how I was before this cuz I was happy as hell

@Anonymous Yeah same here