help , I in 13-14 years masturbated on furry, but then forgot. I had these thoughts again a week ago. am I a zoophile?

About a year ago, I was travelling back home with my mom from a city. This is so embarrassing to admit, but after so many hours of travelling, I got aroused. However, I didn't want to let go of that feeling and wanted to save it for later when I got home. So I deliberately relaxed my body and began thinking about **something** (yes something like that) I would watch later. I also knew that it would make me have a very slight reaction **down there** for half a second because the bus would go up and down slight hills on a bumpy road, causing me to feel like I'm falling on a rollercoaster, but would also cause make me feel something down there for half a second. I did it another two times deliberately, knowing that obviously it wasn't anything much and definitely wasn't obvious at all since I wasn't even doing anything physically. Is what I did unforgivable? Keep in mind I willingly did it knowing it wouldn't look like i was doing anything

TW: porn mentioned When I was younger around 18-19 or maybe younger, I stumbled across some porn labeled as 'teen'. I don't remember if I watched it or get scared away by 'teen', but I then searched for porn something like '18-teen years old', I wanted to make sure it was legal. Now I'm spiraling that I did it because I wanted to see someone younger. Or what my intentions could possibly be? It happened for once or I cannot remembered searching something similar ever again. I've always preferred bigger more masculine men, but why I did that then? I had active porn addiction since I was 9 or I'm afraid younger, watched some things that I regret watching... And now I'm 23 and don't watch it all for like 3 years, because I found out that it was unethical. When I was little I preferred BDSM porn and everyone was very mature and I did not watched anything questionable with real people, but some weird fictional stuff, but didn't like it. Now that I remember this I'm very confused and don't know how to continue living with that. I'm just done...

18+ so, i just had this memory pop back into my head after suppressing it and now I’m obsessing over it and cant suppress it, it feels so weird that i dont think i can even tell my therapist. so a few years ago, i was high, and laying in bed and my dog was laying in front of my face back to me and i kissed his back like mimicking making out, and dont get me wrong this is not a zocd concern it was not attraction im not worried that i touched him sexually im just really weirded out by that memory like someone gauge how weird and immoral that is for me and like i was not a kid, i was an adult its freaking me out like??? tf i do not know how i manage to suppress shit like this like i didnt think it was weird when i was high and i think i remember waking up spiraling about it and then decided to shut it down bcs i had what felt like bigger ocd shit fish to fry and it just popped back up and im spiraling