- Date posted
- 4y
- Date posted
- 4y
I think there's a lot of truth to what you're saying, in that people often turn suffering into a competition, and it's really sad to see. But when people criticize the people who say "I'm so OCD", it's not because we think they're not really suffering. It's because we feel that they're trivializing a serious illness. As an example, if someone tells me they're depressed, I should take their word for it and I should not challenge them with a stupid statement like "you don't know what real depression is because you haven't experienced a, b and c" On the other hand, if they tell me they're depressed and I tell them "yeah I went to a Starbucks today, and they didn't have any vanilla syrup to put in my latte, so I know what you mean" then I'm being an absolute asshat and need to stfu. That's what people who say "I'm so OCD" are doing. They're trivializing our real suffering. It's not a competition, it's about having someone recognize your suffering for what it really is.
- Date posted
- 4y
Thanks! I took the name from him. Love Dostoevsky. Has that ever happened to you? Where someone trivialized your suffering because they misused the label? I’ve had the opposite experience—someone trivializing my suffering because I *lacked* a label, or because (in their eyes) I didn’t hurt as badly as they did and so didn’t need care. Anyway. It’s just triggering. I have that in the back of my mind do often: “You don’t have problems. Get over yourself. You’re just looking for excuses to be a bad person.”
- Date posted
- 4y
I haven't had that happen to me, but it's a really terrible thing to do to someone. It's basically applying a "gatekeeper" attitude with mental illness which can make it more difficult for people with mental illnesses to speak up when they're suffering, and in reality the people who are using the wrong labels are far and few.
- Date posted
- 4y
@NickC Thanks. Well, I’ll admit, the person who puts me down like that the most often is myself. So. I should work on that. I asked my therapist so many times “Is it ok for me to be here? Do I need to just get over myself?” He told me to stop asking him.
- Date posted
- 4y
While it would be best if people didn't misuse medical terms, I see what you mean about suffering being like a competition oftentimes.
- Date posted
- 4y
Also, I love your name. Reminds me of Brothers Karamazov.
Related posts
- Date posted
- 14w
Does anyone struggle with feeling like their ocd issues are not ocd enough compared to other peoples ocd? Is this an ocd thought itself lol
- Date posted
- 13w
I feel like I'm not ocd enough to deserve treatment . I don't feel as bad as other people do.
- Date posted
- 11w
My mom will sit and listen to me for quite a while, but she interrupts a lot and gets angry/upset. While I appreciate her passion, it's often stressful. Every time I come to her, if I even *mention* OCD, she gets frustrated and says, "Everyone deals with these issues, you know. It doesn't mean it's OCD." And I repeat, "I'm not saying my issues are unique — I'm saying the way I respond to them is a problem." But she just shakes her head and says, "Okay, I need to get back to my day." Full context, I'm an adult, and I live with my boyfriend, but I'm staying at my mom's for the next month. After living away from home for years, I went back to living with her during the pandemic, and I only recently left to live with him. Honestly, I think living with her for so long in my adulthood really messed with me and made me feel like a teenager all over again. I feel like my mental growth is stunted, and that's part of why my OCD is so bad lately. Not blaming, just noticing. She doesn't seem to understand how relieving the OCD diagnosis has been for me, because it explains so so so many things I've struggled with for years, and it's exciting to have more resources that can help me. But I think she sees it as me finding an excuse to *not* work on myself, which is just untrue. I'm not going to let OCD hold me back or use it as an excuse, but I'm also not going to pretend it's not a problem when I know it is — I was even diagnosed through NOCD. The whole point being to fix it, not use it as a crutch. When I have an issue, it's unbearable. Any issue, big or small, feels just the same. I feel a sinking feeling, my mind races, my heart beats out of my chest. I end up running to my support systems, crying, ruminating for days on end. Then, months later, the same exact issue can feel like nothing anymore, because it's no longer an obsession. I'm sure everyone deals with issues in a similar way, but I *know* there is something specific and debilitating going on with me. This is reassurance seeking, but in the face of being told I'm making a big deal out of nothing, can someone diagnosed with OCD tell me if they relate to the specific intensity of these feelings??
Be a part of the largest OCD Community
Share your thoughts so the Community can respond