- Date posted
- 6y
- Date posted
- 6y
Yes definitely. Sometimes we don’t get those butterflies because we’re extremely guarded. But it can be built and butterflies can come later. Just live each day with the intention of being happy with your partner and it will come naturally :)
- Date posted
- 6y
I’m about to start dating this really good guy and I’m scared I only like him platonically and not romantically. It’s not the same as what you are dealing with but similar. I feel such shame from it because I want to date him but I don’t feel the butterflies in my stomach and all those things that people talk about. He’s probably the greatest guy I’ve ever known but I can’t shake this fear?
- Date posted
- 6y
Well you know... you don’t need butterflies to know that you love somebody I have met a girl who also has rocd and she has been dating this guy for a long time. She didn’t have a honeymoon phase I have also been afraid of only loving him platonically But you know what? I simply tell myself I CHOOSE TO LOVE HIM PHYSICALLY, I CHOOSE TO TOUCHE HIM! If I truly would NOT want to! Then I would NOT BE DOING IT. That’s acceptance! And you yourself say that you WANT to date him. If you look logically at it... there is nothing that forbids you to do so. You have a choice! Excuse my English ?
- Date posted
- 6y
Thank you! That helps a lot
- Date posted
- 6y
I relate to this - I sometimes think i take my boyfriend for granted - asking him for help, advice, love, reassurance. Then I focus in on his “negative traits” and worry that I’m just selfish and needy. But you’re right, I wouldn’t be in a relationship if I didn’t want to, as I NEVER thought anyone was this great before. And, he consistently tells me I’m kind and thoughtful and amazing - so I guess we have to go with reality not what’s in our heads?
- Date posted
- 6y
You*
Related posts
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 25w
Does anyone else worry and obsess over whether they desire companionship w their partner or if they actually love them? This is a fairly new obsession for me and before this I was so sure and willing to move toward, but now with this I’m feeling like this is my truth.. that I just want companionship with him and I’m not actually in love with him :( and this hurts man I don’t want just companionship I want him for him and I want to grow with him and have a deep meaningful relationship but the feelings ocd gives me feels like that’s a lie and I don’t actually love him deeply, but it’s so weird because I don’t experience that feeling of knowing deep down that it’s true the way I do with soocd. With soocd now I know deep down being with a woman isn’t what I want, and I don’t feel that certainty now with feeling like I don’t love my bf, but it feels like there’s no other option and all this trouble I’m going through to be happy with him is proof I don’t love him
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 25w
I realized I’ve depended a lot on my boyfriend for comfort through my ocd, and I’m starting to feel like even before my ocd I was paying more attention to the relationship itself more than him, or the attachment: even though I remember distinct feelings of me wanting to be with him forever, and feeling so happy and complete with him, time didn’t exist, I felt like my most authentic self. So now I’m trying to create a healthy attachment and see him as his own person, which was helping at first, but now it feels as if I’m seeing that I don’t actually love him for him, the thought of moving forward in life without him breaks my heart and I don’t want to but my mind keeps telling me that I want it because of the attachment. He’s the exact type of person and partner I would want but it feels like whatever I feel is not enough.. But I DO experience moments of affection and care and admiration for him but they don’t last long..before I started making this shift in perspective even with the ocd I was still so sure and confident in moving forward with him, I felt so much like I wanted to be with him for the rest of my life. But now that I’ve made this shift it feels like I’m seeing him from a whole different place. Like all those good and happy feelings I had for him are gone now and I don’t have any confidence in what I want anymore. Before I did feel confident that I wanted to be with him but now it feels like there’s this wall between him and me :( I want to be with him I know I do, because even now I still feel the desire to keep going, but I can’t see the future anymore or the confidence to keep going. I was never much of a future thinker, even in my personal life but this feels like added proof I feel like I’m alone in this like no one else has this situation and the chances for me to realize after I recover that I don’t actually love him are so much higher 💔
- Date posted
- 22w
from Saturday, i didnt talk to chat gbt, didnt post here out of desperation and didnt even cry . but, ofc, i still have thoughts and a strange feeling in my chest but im too over this and tired to respond . But what if i will stop the compulsions and responding to them, ignoring them, but i will still feel bad and realise my thoughts are real and im lying to myself and him. he told me to tell him when a though pops out so he can talk me through it bc he wants to help me and he is sad i always ask people online for help and not him, he did helped me various times but sometimes in just too much. Im scared, this is stupid i know, i know yhis is dumb and it annoys me. i think that he is cringe and annoying and that i dont stand him , and that means i dont like him bc sometimes i get mad at him and look at him with “disgusting “ but not in that way. like what if i dont stand him and i am with him bc im used to him and what if he is cringe and annoying… IM MORR CRUNGE AND ANNOYING THEN HIM BUT IT MAKES ME THINK I DONT LIKE HIM.
Be a part of the largest OCD Community
Share your thoughts so the Community can respond