Does anyone else struggle to just let go of their thoughts?

Im sorry. How old are you?

@luchalysol 35 you?

@kls323 Im 27

@luchalysol I hear so many people on here way younger going through this. It has to be so hard.

@kls323 Most ocd appears from 8yrs old until early adulthood I believe, its rare to get a late onset. Supposedly it normally lasts 12-15yrs before a proper diagnosis

@luchalysol Thats interesting. I wonder if ive had it alot longer then.

@Kls323 Could be, I didnt realize I ever had it until I looked back at the past and saw that I did engage in ocd like behaviors as young as 12.

@luchalysol I always thought of ocd differently and never thought I would ov had it. I dont think I had it when I was little but when I think back in my late teens and twenties I think I had it then. Never harm though that is really new from the past year.

@Kls323 Me either, up until this onset I was very unaware of what ocd was. I thought it was just cleanliness, the stereotypical stuff. It wasnt until this onset that I realized it takes different forms. I dont recal having harm thoughts, but I would often worry about being a sociopath

@luchalysol Same. Thats exactly how I thought of it because thats how they would put it on t.v. I would always obsessive over everything and never knew that was a part of ocd

@Kls323 Me too! Its very likely it was a mild form. I dont ever recall my ocd iterfering with my life until about 2yrs ago

@luchalysol Same here. I really noticed last year. It kept getting worse and now is the time I want to do something about it. Erp or meds whatever makes it stop.

@Kls323 Do you have any other things such as ptsd or depression? Im currently on meds and therapy

@luchalysol Oh you did start the med? I rember you saying something about it. How do you feel? Any side effects? My anxiety has always been bad. I know at some points in my life I've had depression years ago but not now.

@Kls323 Yes, I started last tuesday on sertraline. I feel ok, I was told it take an average of 3 weeks for it to kick in. Ive only noticed I wake up at 5am everyday since I started taking it. I see, it is likely an extra contributor to your ocd.

@luchalysol I'm happy for you. For being on it for a week and only Waking up at 5 is all worth it if it helps in the long run.

@Kls323 I agree. Yeah, so far no other side effects. Someone did scare me by mentioning they experienced more thoughts with this med but hopefully it doesnt happen to me.

@luchalysol Yes. Thats what I've heard as well. And with harm ocd we definitely do not want more of those. But you have been on for a week. I think you got through the biggest part of it.

@Kls323 Hopefully, it has been very difficult to deal with them being with my family and them sometimes feeling so real. Im hoping I continue to get better

@luchalysol I'm sure you will. You are doing both meds and erp. Success rate seems pretty high with combining them both.

@Kls323 Im hoping so. It has been hard doing erp but I recently bought a book and Im hoping to practice excercises as well as treat my ptsd

@luchalysol What book did you get? I was thinking about getting one.

@Kls323 I got the ocd answer book by patrick mcgrath and the ocd workbook

@luchalysol Thanks I will have to look into that one. Anything that helps ill try.

@Kls323 Hopefully it helps. I just started reading it so cant say much just yet. I also got this audiobook called because we are bad by lily bailey. A great listen too

@luchalysol Thank you 😀

@Kls323 No problem 😊😊

How is your therapy coming along? How you been feeling

@kls323 Yesterday and today have been harder than prior days. But it may be due to my move on Wed

Yes! I always feel like if I don’t do my compulsions I’m the scum of the earth :(

@EtOCD Exactly. It feels horrible

@luchalysol Thats right you were moving. Are you all settled in? Are you back with your son?

@kls323 I move on wednesday, staying with my parents in the meantime

@luchalysol Sometimes its nice getting a change

@kls323 Yes, it just sucks when I have thoughts of harming my family all the time

@luchalysol I agree. I dont understand how we can have these thoughts of someone we love so much and would do anything for. It doesn't make sense.

@kls323 Sadly its whom ocd targets. It can get to be too much sometimes and it will leave me exhausted.

@luchalysol I just don't understand why. 😓 leaves me exhausted as well. Also headaches alot from it.

@kls323 Ive gotten quite a few as well. I also sleep a lot cause of the mental/emotional exhaustion

@luchalysol I sleep normal amount but always wake up throughout the night.

@kls323 That sucks though cause you never get a full nights sleep

@luchalysol Exactly!!! I'm so exhausted all the time

@kls323 I can fully relate to that. I hate getting up in the morning and always try to go back to sleep

@luchalysol It is hard to get back to sleep. I want to shut off my mind.

@kls323 Me too. I wish I coukd go back to how it was when I didnt have these thoughts.

@luchalysol When did it start for you?

@kls323 Ive had it since I was 12 but a full onset of contanination started 2yrs ago and then full onset of hram ocd at the beginning of this year