Ugh my brain is like recovering memories of intrusive thoughts and gauging my reactions like: Remember when you had a naked thought of that coworker who was like a month away from turning 18 and you were like “Eh thats not great, but she turns 18 soon and she’s attractive and lots of guys probably have thoughts like this” Well THAT PROVES that you are evil and gross, and after she turned 18, when you allowed yourself to have these thoughts, that was equally creepy because you had the first one before that and didn’t PUNISH yourself about it Like and i feel like i’m totally alone in this, like millions of women didn’t breathe a sigh of relief when Bieber turned 18

I get it man, there will always be stuff to confess. So at some point just have build a filter or else your robbing yourself of enjoying your time with her. I’m practicing the same with my wife - although she is super understanding we don’t want this to be our main thing so it’s all about sitting with the fact that there may be some unknown stuff. But I totally relate. Practice not confessing - let the urge sit there

To make you feel less alone when I started dating my now wife (we are 28 and 31) she was several months away from turning 18 and I just turned 21. Be easy on yourself.

It just makes me feel gross, and it was a thought i didnt ask for but since i didnt punish myself or maybe even was just like “whatever she’s good looking this is normal” It just makes it AWFUL But thats the thing! Like i feel like that was a mentally healthy response ya know? And i’m punishing myself for it

I get it, that’s our thing right. We punish ourselves, we distort things, we magnify them and we always tend to abide in the lies and false interpretations.

Yeah for real...and like she was hitting on me alot but i asked her to stop because she was too young...and when she was 18 i guess id think about her sexually sometimes but i was like almost 10 years older, i felt like dating someone that young would be innappropriate and i was hoping my younger friend Tim and her would shack up...so i’m proud of my behavior but part of me feels like i was just in denial or lying to myself

I know this is like confession and reassurance seeking but i just dont wanna confess any more of this bullshit to my girlfriend, she asked me not to and i haven’t gained the tools from therapy to deal with all of this yet

Confession plagued me as well. I recently went through that. You have one confession, you confess, you get another one, you confess. It’s a cycle.

Yeah and i confessed worse stuff and she was like “i still like you, but you don’t have to tell me this stuff” but my brain rephrases every new thought as worse than the last

Yup. Because we magnify stuff. I still go through those moments and I’m learning not to confess every OCD moment. It’s practice and learning to sit in discomfort

Yeah i started therapy but its only been like two meetings and we’re still working really generally, i’ve been doing really great with my OCD the last couple years, but i met this amazing girl, and like i just get a bad feeling that if she knew everything about me she’d leave, and she knows the worst stuff now but it just gets smaller and smaller

You right, i just read about how you’ll start confessing about how you thought another lady was cute or you had a gross intrusive thought during sex....its the main reason i started therapy im pretty damn sure this chick is THE ONE so i wanna make sure not to put extra strain on the relationship