a01
- Date posted
- 4y
animalluveranimalluver
- Date posted
- 4y
Hi there, one strategy I learned from a therapist that I found helpful is: when you have those thoughts, instead of trying to convince yourself that the thoughts aren’t true try saying things like “maybe it’s true, I could be.” For example, instead of convincing yourself that you’re not gay, say “maybe I am gay.” This will likely make you feel more anxious, but with time by practicing the act of accepting the thoughts, you’ll notice that your anxiety over the thoughts should decrease.
a01a01
- Date posted
- 4y
I've been told to do that as well but I just don't want to be gay. I'm starting to worry about if I ever even had/have heterosexual thoughts because it seems it's just homosexual thoughts. It's to the point where if I see an attractive female I can't look for too long because then my mind will say that I like and want her...is it possible to be discovering my sexuality out of nowhere like this...I just want to be my straight self
animalluveranimalluver
- Date posted
- 4y
@a01 I completely understand, and I know the easiest thing to do is avoid the thoughts. However, when you have those thoughts say when you look at a female, instead of getting upset and worrying that you’re gay, try affirming the thoughts and saying “yup, maybe I do like her. Maybe I do want her.” Again, I know it’s uncomfortable but the more you learn to accept the thoughts the less they’ll occur overtime. Exposure and response therapy really helped me, and I recommend it if you haven’t tried it already.
a01a01
- Date posted
- 4y
@animalluver Yeah I'll have to try it on my own because my therapist is clueless on this kind of ocd
animalluveranimalluver
- Date posted
- 4y
@a01 I think your best bet is to find another therapist who specializes in sexual orientation ocd. My first therapist couldn’t help me with it either, and it took some trial and error before I found the right one.
animalluveranimalluver
- Date posted
- 4y
@animalluver Maybe try a therapist here on the app!
optimisticoptimistic
- Date posted
- 4y
@animalluver This is such wonderful advice! The “maybe” aspect is the key here. It’s no help to say, “Well I’m straight” or “Well, I’m gay” in response to these thoughts because it continues the black and white thinking. Sometimes I need reminding of this. Accepting the uncertainity, no matter how scary, is the answer!!
AnonymousAnonymous
- Date posted
- 4y
I mean I completely relate to this with OCD. I’ve sadly been more aroused by naked women than men and have rationalized this in my mind as well. But I don’t know what else to do, I can’t worry forever
AnonymousAnonymous
- Date posted
- 4y
Has anything helped you recover, sorry reading this really brought back a lot of anxiety for me
a01a01
- Date posted
- 4y
@wellwellwell Honestly nothing yet I'm really struggling
YesYouYesYou
- Date posted
- 4y
When I hear denial to me that means they are just keeping it a secret. You would know if you were gay. You might feel naughty having the gay thoughts but it would feel right and you wouldn't be having this tugowar in your head
a01a01
- Date posted
- 4y
But sometimes the thoughts do feel right...last night I got no sleep because I was having so much anxiety and my heart was racing because I just don't know and I don't want to be
AnonymousAnonymous
- Date posted
- 4y
@a01 Not to bother you, but could you please respond to my comment above about anything helping
YesYouYesYou
- Date posted
- 4y
@a01 Why dont you want to be gay?
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