- Date posted
- 6y
- Date posted
- 6y
i feel exactly the same way:(
- Date posted
- 6y
I also struggle with contamination ocd but I try to resist the urge of washing my hands by thinking about how I never used to wash my hands this much before all of this started, and nothing bad happened so why would it now - and I keep thinking about that and try to distract myself until the anxiety fades a bit. It’s hard and it doesn’t always work but it’s a great feeling that you get after you feel you have combatted a compulsion even if it’s just once . I hope this helps :)
- Date posted
- 6y
yeah i have tried to not wash my hands but i still don’t like how my hands feel and I just can’t move on with my daily life without washing them. It feels easier to just wash them and then not have to think about it the rest of the day rather than having them dirty and obsessing over it the rest of the day. @s0ph
- Date posted
- 6y
I know that feeling :( the only thing I could suggest is forcing yourself to do it, obviously you’re going to be incredibly anxious, but sometimes when I’m feeling less anxious than others, I almost play on the ocd, by like touching something when my hands feel dirty and then be kind of like oh well the germs are already out there now so there’s nothing I can do about it, if you get what I mean? :)
- Date posted
- 6y
what’s that @naeun
- Date posted
- 6y
no I have not done it, do u think I need it? @naeun
- Date posted
- 6y
I am 15 @naeun
- Date posted
- 6y
Hey @Emily25. Just want to let you know you’re not alone. I’m 15 as well and have had contamination OCD like yours for about 3 years. Also, normal is entirely overrated. Average won’t get you far (but I completely understand what you mean and what I said is extraordinary cheesy)
- Date posted
- 6y
I just don’t know how to not wash my hands after I eat something. I watch other people do it and wonder how. I hate the way my hands feel after I eat something and I guess it’s normal to not wash them. So what do I do? @sarai
- Date posted
- 6y
The only thing I can suggest is to just try to put up with the uncomfortable feeling for as long as possible, then try to grow on that time. If that’s 30 seconds, not a problem, because later you can do 1 minute. This is pretty much ERP. It feels a bit counterintuitive and painful, but it’s one of the few ways to practice being ‘normal ‘
- Date posted
- 6y
Normal doesn’t exist. See what the worst thing that’s going to happen would be if you didn’t use hand sanitizer and I’m sure you’ll be okay.
Related posts
- Date posted
- 20w
It’s been 4 years. 4 years since I spiralled into a world controlled by rituals of 4, it started as 2, then 3, then 4 - my safe number. The amount of times I wash my hands after touching something dirty and how many repeats it takes until I feel ‘clean’, the amount of taps I make when closing doors to make sure I don’t ‘die’, the amount of times I rinse cutlery and plates before eating off them, the amount of times I disinfect things. My OCD subtype is contamination and I know 2020 lockdowns and the pandemic caused it to spiral but what started as a small ritual quickly became bigger until I no longer remembered what my life was like without the obsessive thoughts of germs and contamination. Could that person be ill? What if I go outside to the shops and someone makes me sick? You can’t answer the door to get that package from the delivery driver because he might make you sick, oh you can’t put the shopping away without disinfecting it first - what if someone has coughed on it? ‘I’ve got to wear gloves to do that’ I can’t, I can’t, I can’t. For 4 years I’ve lived like this, the ‘I don’t want to touch that’ or ‘I can’t go to this place because I don’t want to get ill and die’ ‘can you go do that for me as I don’t think I can right now’ - I know my OCD is irrational, I know the likelihood of those things actually happening are slim to none and I know my OCD stems from a need of control in my life because for so many years I felt like everything in my life was out of my control. But no matter how much I know of how many books I read, how many mindful practices I do the panic I feel after being ‘exposed’ or before exposing myself to a trigger is horrible. I’ve avoided and avoided and avoided to the point where something small now seems and feels like an impossible mountain to climb. It often feels like there isn’t light at the end of the tunnel on the dark days, when I know there is, it’s just going to take some time. Despite this on the outside to those not in my circle my life is a whole picture perfect painting. I run my own business, have a nice car, a nice house, a happy relationship and the of best friends and I’m so grateful for all those things but the reality is much different - behind closed doors and hidden in the closest is the OCD monster. I’ve decided now, after 4 years it’s time to change. I’m breaking the cycle and starting anew. The irony that 4 is my safe number too and it’s been 4 years since things started to get dark. I’m ready to lose control and find myself again. Why am I writing this? Honestly, I really don’t know. I found this app recently and hope it can be a help for my ERP practices I’ve been practicing on my own and it’s actually the first time I’ve ever openly posted or spoken about my OCD to date. For years I have lived with a huge amount of shame and embarrassment, hiding my issues from everyone - even my closest friends have no idea how much it impacts my day to day. I’ve felt shame as I can’t control my own mind despite knowing the thoughts are irrational and the rituals only provide temporary relief but each day again and again the safety blanket of the rituals wraps me up and takes over. The only person who truly knows how much it affects me is my partner, who has been by my side through it all, he’s burnt out and has seen first hand the impact it has had on me, my life and my happiness. I’ve sheltered him as much as I can, but I’m sure those who are in relationships with OCD can relate to the burnout their partner feels day in day out. So that’s my story, I hope those going through similar can take comfort in this and know they aren’t alone in it all as my OCD has made me feel so incredibly lonely, isolated and empty for 4 years too long. It feels freeing to finally share my monster and I hope I can connect with others who are on a similar journey to me. The biggest thing I want to be able to do again? I want to be able to hug my loved ones without feeling triggered, I want to go outside and enjoy life without worry, I want to live again. This app has made me feel seen for the first time in a long time and reading your stories, your experiences and how you’re coping is comforting, encouraging and makes me feel less alone ❤️ thank you for reading x
- Date posted
- 18w
i’ve been dealing with this “thing” since i was 15. (i’m 23 now) if i have a bad memory that i have done when i was really young or just an intrusive thought i feel like i need to tell my mom or boyfriend. it’s been on and off ever since but since January hit it’s been an everyday thing about the littlest things. mostly about my relationship. an example is i was talking to someone random at my job and we were talking about taxes and when im in deep thought or just thinking i do a thing where i bite my lip (not in the sexual way) and i had a thought when it happened “was that sexual?” and i felt like i did something wrong and i went for a while thinking that until i told my boyfriend about it. or like my ex’s face has popped up in my head in the most inappropriate times and i feel the need that i have to tell him. (my ex was not a good person) i feel like im a prisoner in my head everyday, trying to justify thoughts or remind myself that its just a thought. i didnt know that this was or could be a form of ocd. it runs in my family but i’ve just never considered it being this. i always called it anxiety or depression but i always felt like it is more than that.
- Date posted
- 18w
Hi, I’m new to this app and newly diagnosed. Question for you all, What things did you normalize and do without a second thought that when diagnosed, you realized was actually your OCD? Mine was how concerned with germs I am. I hold my breath when I open a door so the rush of wind doesn’t infect my lungs from whatever is in the room. I thought everyone was really careful and concerned like me. But Ive learned it’s not normal the lengths I go to. What was yours?
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