So I was talking to this girl through Instagram— not like anything major but just like “oh you’re cute haha” and then I found out she’s 16 and immediately told her I can’t flirt with her anymore but now I feel awful for even thinking like that before I knew :( I feel like a predator or criminal

May i ask how old are you? Also I don’t want to reassure you but things like that happen. Don’t stress too much about it

She’s not that much younger than you. Even if she lives in a place where that’s age of consent, you shut even just light flirting down as soon as you found out. At your age it’s weird because people not much younger than you are in a different legal category than you. In HS and part of college, my SO was 3 years older than me. He wasn’t “robbing the cradle” or doing anything wrong, but we understood how at certain respective ages it could FEEL legally awkward. It actually was never a legal issue in our jurisdiction, though friends would tease us. The rest is now your OCD latching on. Please fight it! You got this! And you have us here too! 💪🏼💜

you’re not a predator or a criminal since you set that flirting boundary! 3 years doesn’t seem like a big gap but as a former 16 year old with a 19 year old partner, that’s a big 3 years. my emotional maturity and capacity to consent was way different from 16 to 19 and even 19 to 20 & 21. I don’t think there’s anything wrong with continuing your friendship as long as you continue to set and maintain platonic boundaries, and aren’t just “waiting until she’s 18.”