I feel like I’ve just been in denial this whole time. I feel like I’m 100% attracted to girls and I’m happy about it. It just feels like I’m now just scared to come out. I have a boyfriend of 4 and a half years and he knows about my hocd. My therapist tells me that even if I’m sexually attracted to girls that doesn’t mean I’m bi sexual, I don’t have to date and go out and have sex with girls. I’m in a relationship either way. But it feels like I want to talk about my attraction to girls and if I don’t I’m hiding it. It’s so stupid. I hate this. :( I fought this thing for nothing I guess.

A feeling doesn’t necessarily reflect anything about reality. Ever feel like something brushed up against your leg, but you look down and nothing was there? Ever hear something like your phone ringing, yet when you check your phone there’s no missed calls? Your subjective experience in those instances are no different than if they actually happened. As far as you’re concerned, the phone did ring since you perceived it to have happened. But those feelings don’t reveal any truth. They’re passing experiences in consciousness.

I’ve been going through this exact thing. It literally sounds like something I would type out. You have to label it as an intrusive thought. It took me a while to learn that, I understand. But you have to keep fighting !