This really fucking sucks rn I feel like I’m a lesbian and I want it When I truly don’t want these thoughts or to be with a girl. I don’t want to want girls either. I want guys. I want butterflies and those romantic, giddy feelings for guys not girls. I want to fall in love with a guy. I want to want guys and not have my fucking mind telling me they’re gross. I’m so jealous of girls that are so attracted to guys and have bfs cause I want that I hate this so much :( I don’t know how to get better I’m even uncomfortable at the thought of being sexual with manly guys now as well :( (Do any of y’all any experience that?)

Same exact boat girl! I want butterflies from a guy so bad.

Same boat. It feels so real. It is terrifying. I don’t want this. I just want to go back to be able to enjoy my time with my girlfriend. Just did some ERP and though I did my best not to engage in compulsions, it felt so real the whole time.

Yeah man. Feels so real. Just did some ERP looking at some of the tik tok personalities. Crazy false attraction, or maybe real attraction. Made me cry to be honest. Just have to move forward no matter what. Trying not to give into the compulsions at the moment. How about you?

Im getting the same sort of thing towards girls tho. When i think about girls or pussy my mind goes eww.. its so distressing. I feel you on this one

Your disgusted by men you mean ?

I know where your coming from

I cant get over that i look gay. I seem to be noticeing guys first rather than girls. This is horrible

Yup.

You feel me on that mate?. It sucks doesnt it

I know mate yesterday i was breaking down most of the day. I hate the feelings i get with my thoughts in my chest stomach and in my neck its weird when i see a good looking guy. I dont even know what my compulsions are mate 😞

Analyzing is definitely one. It is tough because it is almost automatic. Like, if it feels like you are attracted to a good looking guy, just sit with the anxiety, face it. Don’t look away. At the same time, don’t try to determine how you are actually feeling. When I am doing ERP my head is making me feel like I am attracted and as such, that I need to imagine myself in different scenarios or evaluate why I am feeling that way. No need for that answer. Just sit there and let the feelings come through.

From my understanding, eventually you aclimate to the uncertainty and the feeling and go on with your life, especially if you didn’t feel like this before. We had a similar progression though. I got it about 6 years ago and had it mostly under control with a little anxiety from time to time, but it hit hard again. Makes it difficult to remember what it was like before.

It is hard mate. I find im checking myself all the time. Like now im laying in bed and i think im looking gay doing it etc..