- Date posted
- 4y
- Date posted
- 4y
I recommend to stay away from porn for a bit, it can really mess with your head I’m struggling with POCD and my porn addiction made it worse. I advise you to stay away from it really can make your POCD worse.
- Date posted
- 4y
Okay thank you, I just feel bad since I purposely went on the newly added page to see if there was child porn even tho I had no plan on watching it :/, it’s just hard since it’s a addiction. You know what I mean?
- Date posted
- 4y
@noone800 Child porn isn’t an addiction but porn in general is. I was just curious if there was child porn on the newly added page since the website says they watch all videos. And I was just genuinely curious and had no plan on masturbaiting to it or anything. I just feel bad :/
- Date posted
- 4y
@noone800 Yea porn does mess up a persons mind, it’s best to stick with the uncertainty when it comes to intensive thoughts since finding answers only feeds the obsession.
- Date posted
- 4y
@anonynon I know you shouldn’t provide but fo you think I’m a bad person or weird for seeing if there was cp on the website since I was curious even tho I had no intention of watching or mastuebsiting to it :/
- Date posted
- 4y
@noone800 Well I’m suffering POCD as well and I also have unwanted urges to “see” if I’d enjoy something I’m not normally into, I also feel bad for having these thoughts and urges hell I fear that if I did do them I’d enjoy them idk what to say but your not alone I feel bad about myself often
- Date posted
- 4y
@Valentino Yes intensive thoughts seem and feel real it’s out of our control and often we seek reassurances to help us feel better it’s best to accept and move one pushing it away makes it worse
- Date posted
- 4y
@Valentino No not yet
- Date posted
- 4y
@Valentino Yeah I know I just feel bad because like I literally was like “what if there’s cp on the newest page.” Because I was curious. I just need to learn to let this go and accept that this is part of my ocd and I feel guilty about it so i need to move on and never guve into that compulsion.
- Date posted
- 4y
I think when it comes to CP it's only suspicious and strange if you actively search for it like daily or monthly as if you were a customer for it or whatever. Downloading it with the intent to keep it is also pretty fucked up. But in your case, you didn't do anything wrong, you had a thought hoping that there wasn't any to be seen and thankfully there wasn't. OCD is just messing with you at the moment. But anonynon is right, you should probably stay away from porn a bit. That's what I'm doing. Masturbating isn't really the problem but the compulsive use of porn is. It's gross
Related posts
- Date posted
- 19w
I have this same situation replaying in my head. It has to do with porn so if your young just know this may be a little graphic. I tend to use Twitter for porn and the reason I do this is it’s a lot more direct I can type in what I want to see and it’s there I don’t have to go through unknown websites and hope not to get viruses, and to be a little more specific more amateur/ real sexual experiences come up on Twitter rather than porn pages with staged written scenes. So in my use of Twitter for this there’s been times when questionable material/ illegal material has come up and never did I save it knowing it was 100% illegal or even interact with it if I knew it was 100% illegal. I was 18 or 19 at the time of this and I started to fear that in these moments I would look at these illegal videos/ sketchy videos to long when they would pop up like for example I remember seeing a video that was 100% illegal content and I was so shocked and like confused that I looked at it for a moment and then left and then I went back to look at it again just to confirm that I was seeing what I thought I was seeing I also remember seeing videos that were in a 18+ section but sometimes the girls in the videos looked like they could be 15-17. As we all know 18 year olds can look anywhere from 15-17 or even younger these days so I would be cautious and use my context clues and what I knew when watching videos that I was suspicious about but had no proof of them being illegal aside from my thoughts and the person looking young. So with this and me worrying I got super scared and hyper aware of what I was watching and now I remember me going back on Twitter to look at content that I was intending to be 18+ but all I would think about is what if something illegal would come up what if I see it and I look for to long or what if I feel attracted and I like it. And I just remember going back to Twitter to look at legal porn but it felt like I was there so that something illegal could come up to see how I’d naturally react to it. Never did I go and type in key words or type in anything illegal in fact I remember times I would strictly put 18+ next to whatever I was searching so I could be sure everything was legal but sometimes it would feel like my hope and intention was that I would see something illegal so that I could feel that anxiety rush or just to see how I would react naturally to seeing it and I feel like this would count as me intentionally looking for it so now I feel disgusting and like I committed a crime. Sometimes I just feel like I was only looking at porn because I wanted to feel that anxiety of what if something bad comes up and how would I react. I know deep down I didn’t want to see illegal content and that I was probably just feeling that I wanted to check how id feel if it did come up but now I feel like I was intentionally looking and that my whole objective was for something questionable to come up so I can see how I react. Is this ocd or did I just make a horrible decision?
- Date posted
- 19w
I’m worried about times when Child P*rn or suspicious porn videos have come up in the past. I tend to use Twitter for porn and it’s not the most moderated app out there but I was never looking for videos or pictures or anything related to that. Unfortunately stuff still has popped up and I’m just worried about if my reaction was perfect because I have intense POCD I want to say it’s nearly as severe as it can get so I just feel as if I remember times when something suspicious came up and I stayed for a moment to make sure I wasn’t attracted or maybe left and came back to be sure I was safe and didn’t like it and I’m afraid this counts as seeking out or engaging in illegal content that would get me in trouble. I’ve never once looked this stuff up and anyone who creates saves distributed or likes this stuff I believe deserves prison time for life but I’m just so worried that I didn’t react in the way I should’ve I’m 20 years old so I’m relatively young and I’m jus worried about what this means about me any one else deal with anything similar?
- Date posted
- 13w
Okay so I'm young. A bit young than u might Imagine. Me and my boyfriend where bored and I searched up gay porn js as a joke on google. It was completely blurred. And we where js talking about our truma, and personal stuff while literally just looking at the titles. And I saw a title. A title that has trumstixed me before (I saw the actual video before involving a minor. ) and I clicked on it, still heavily blurred to show my boyfriend the title. And i said baby this really effected me this video. And then I looked below it, same video, blurred. Different title. And I clicked on it to stupidly read the other title. And it FUCKING UNBLURRED. and I SCREAMED saying to my boyfriend if he saw it. And he said no he looked away. And he was so unfazed. And I asked chat gpt about it and it said what I done was NOT okay. Because I looked at child stuff on purpose? My heart has just SANK. self harm urges are back. INTENSE confession compulsions to my mum are back. What do I do. Please someone help.
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