I have sunk so low in life. I've thoughts about being a pedophile, being gay (not that there is anything wrong with being gay) being schizophrenic, being a psychopath, being a narcist, being a sociopath, obsessions about having cancer or some other disease and I could go on. Last three years have been long, terrible years. I'm so tired of living with this. Last couple of weeks I've been feeling very suicidal. I have no libido, no appetite and no interest in things other than doing compulsions. I've been thinking about ending it for a while now. I got urges to end my life. Has anybody else on this app ever felt suicidal? What did you do to make it feel better? I don't want to die bc I'm very ambitious, and I'm not ready to die yet, but i also don't want to life with these thoughts anymore..

We are one of the mentally strong people to have intrusive thoughts and still do full time jobs go to college and honestly every day being in the world is part a erp even with the therapist

I’ve been severely suicidal on a number of occasions, once for eighteen months straight. I don’t know how I survived that, but I am so incredibly grateful that I did. It took years to recover, but I wouldn’t trade a single day of it. You can get through this. It will be so utterly worth it when you do.

I literally have all the same exact intrusive thoughts and then some.. I wasn't even going to reply because today has been mentally exhausting like the past weeks have but I had to because I don't want someone to feel alone in this if they don't have to.. This ocd hurts.. it's isolating and shameful.. I don't want to live life this way.. I just try and hold on to the hope that the obsessing and analyzing will once again pass because I want to once again be happy

yes you can beat this. all of those are symptoms of ocd and i have personally been scared of all of them. i also lost my appetite and no interest. have you been to a doctor?

Yes, I have had experiences of being suicidal. We share many of the same obsessions, and it really makes you feel like you might secretly be a terrible person. We just have to practise being uncertain and do our ERP to our bad thoughts. Wishing you luck.

I just remember to myself that my ocd is one condition and I can’t take on disorders that are not mine and I will overcome it after time of therapeutic exercise erp or any of those

We are strong to overcome it. We will probably always battle it but it's doable for me so far

I've had all of the above those I over came with the cancer or other stuff but it took me years of therapy

with the thought of having things wrong that I don't have It took me years to overcome it