- Date posted
- 4y
- Date posted
- 4y
I’m glad I read your post because it is literally the way I feel. 100% . I have noticed that the more I try to accept the thoughts and sensations, the more they haunt me and appear in my mind. But my brain doesn’t react anxiously, like it did in the beggining, but it’s like an arousal which is soo urgent and so powerful, that my chest hurts. In those moments, I feel compelled to masturbate to get rid of this feeling. It feels too real. It feels like true arousal and need for sex. But with whom? With a man or a woman? I keep getting very graphic images of women and they increase the feeling. It feels so real, like I have no other option than to turn lesbian. My brain is in sex mode 24/7. And it is miserable. I hate it
- Date posted
- 4y
I feel the exact same way!!!! I get these crazy urges to masturbate to the thoughts and it tells me I like them even though it never gets me up. Does it make you feel like you would enjoy specific acts?
- Date posted
- 4y
@nGfloat I literarly can get such an urge from something like going to the toilet, it is crazy. I feel like all the energy i’m supressing is stuck in my chest and the only way to let it out is to masturbate. But the act itself is not for pleasure, more like a necessity
- Date posted
- 4y
@cnv I could cry. I have the same thing. Every time I go to the bathroom/see my privates, I feel like I have to. I am so confused because I can’t tell anymore. I know I used to love being with women and never felt that way towards men, and I love my gf, but it feels so real doesn’t it?
- Date posted
- 4y
@nGfloat It does
- Date posted
- 4y
i feel the same way. it feels so real sometimes and feels like denial. At first i hated it in the beginning but i’ve had the thoughts too often, it like doesn’t bother me? but i don’t want to like it! and i don’t want to be with woman but the constant bi thoughts keep coming and it feels like my mind wants to accept it and be that, and i’m turning into liking girls, which i never did in the past. I used to watch lesbian porn in the past too but it never bothered me bc i still was into guys. This year I’ve been with 2 guys in a relationship and they went down horribly, to a point where my brain doesn’t even want to picture a guy bc it doesn’t want to go through that pain. I understand you totally, it just feels so real and that i’m denying it and my mind just thinks i should go that route now bc the “last times” with guys didn’t work out. i feel like i’m just becoming bi and it’s denial, but like when i really picture kissing a girl or having sex, i cringe and shake my head, but the those thoughts are just becoming more common and it feels like i would like it but i don’t want to!
- Date posted
- 4y
I’m really sorry that you are going through this. Are you seeing a therapist? Just remember we can have all the thoughts and feelings we want but it doesn’t mean anything about us. When it comes to sexuality , what we want should feel good not something we fear.
- Date posted
- 4y
Feeling the same way. I am so confused. I love my girlfriend but it feels like I’m gay and I want the thoughts. I think about being with a dude in my head and something just isn’t right. I still can’t shake it though.
- Date posted
- 4y
Exactly
Related posts
- Date posted
- 22w
I need too know that I'm not insane, really. I am 16 and for the past two weeks, this has been completely ruining my health and happiness. I only recently came out as a lesbian like 3 months ago after a lot of confusion about my attraction since I used to think I liked men. At first, I felt so sure that I liked women, but lately, I've been having these unwanted thoughts about the possibility of liking men. I never used to feel this way, but now, every time I look at a man, my brain obsessively fixates on it. It forces me to imagine kissing him, loving him, things I don’t want, and then tries to convince me that I do. It’s painful. The thought of this fills me with fear and anxiety, leading to panic attacks and breakdowns. I don’t want these thoughts. I hate them with every fiber of my being, but I’m terrified that one day I’ll act on them and somehow like it. I used to think I liked men, but back then, I was in a very unhealthy space in a time of escapism and something deeply parasocial. I’ve only ever liked the attention and validation a man could give me, but these experiences are somehow treated as further proof that I’m "bisexual." I’ve never been in a real relationship with anyone, which makes my brain constantly challenge me—telling me, “You don’t even know what love feels like.” It won’t shut up. It keeps obsessively trying to make me prove that I’m a lesbian, testing my reactions and questioning my certainty. Is this normal?
- Date posted
- 19w
hi i’m a lesbian! and i have known im a lesbian for a really long time and i have a sweet girlfriend of 1 year. it all started when i saw this masc lesbian come out as straight, after that i had my guy friend over and he’s a sweet guy and he was flirting with me (he didn’t know i was gay) im not sure but i panicked and my brain froze and i was like “do i like him”, ever since my brain has been over worked 24/7 for 2 months now and it’s spiralling constantly. im trying to control it but all these thoughts are so disgusting and my brain tries to put him and i in scenarios that make me uncomfortable and i feel panic and i hate it. i have always been comfortable being a lesbian and i still am comfortable as a lesbian, but i dislike these thoughts i have about him and men and i want it to be over. i do not want to experiment with men even tho my brain is telling me i do, i find it disgusting and i dread it, i have a sweet girlfriend and i want to be with her forever, i do not imagine anything with any men and i hate these thoughts. im scared of becoming bisexual/straight one day and i hate hearing sexuality is fluid. its a whole mix of comphet and so-ocd
- Date posted
- 17w
I’m like 90% sure I’m just bi, more romantically inclined to men, mainly my bf who I wanna marry. But now my brain is like “if you lean into liking women or keep circling and circling for answers you’ll lose all attraction to men and your bf. You’re practically already a lesbian” I feel so tense and anxious I will admit I am talking to chat gpt out of desperation I’m scared of losing all attraction to him I don’t wanna be thinking about women. I don’t unless I’m really stressed cuz when I’m stressed my ocd can take advantage of that I can usually ground myself when I’m in the city with him but I’m back home for most of the summer and I can’t be physically close to him which usually reminds me that hey this is real this is what I really want in life. Him But then I panic and question I haven’t been here in a while tbh. I’m worried I don’t feel enough. I don’t like magic Mike all that much, I like softer guys. But now the fact I don’t like/get turned on by random men on tv but do women in lingerie really stresses me out and makes me worry I’m truly a lesbian but I’m not. Once I started getting to know my bf and my ex bf’s I really did truly genuinely like them and wanted to make out and everything. Idk can anyone relate to the not liking big buff men All my brain is repeating rn is “when he dies you’ll be able to date a woman, when you break up you’ll only wanna date women” and it’s stressing me out. It’s making me nauseous. I was doing well for about a couple days after I initially left but being at home has been so incredibly draining This might give you a vision of how stressful home is: I’ve been on nexplanon for 7 months ish? Only had very minimal spotting during a stressful school period. Today: fully bleeding, like a usual period. I haven’t had my period since having it put in. I wanna go back to my bf so badly rn. I’m so worried I’m faking or don’t feel enough. I’m learning what a healthy relationship looks like and I’m terrified I’m gonna up and leave him when we’re older cuz I’ll finally figure out that I’m a lesbian or smthn. Idk. Someone pls just help me out a tad
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