I just had a moment of big panic because I keep having obsessions about reality and how is it possible that I’m able to perceive it. You know when you say a word out loud way too many times, and it starts losing its meaning and sounds weird? Same thing happens to me with reality. Sometimes it gets so intense, it makes me wanna vomit or feel like I’ll faint. I just don’t understand existence and everything feels so weird. I can’t get over it. This is my worst obsession :(

Yep I know exactly how you feel. I remember one night in July last year, I sat on my bed and just thought so much about life and how weird it is and I got so much anxiety. Even just going downstairs later that night felt off. And the thing about repeating a word until it loses its meaning is so true in relation to existential OCD! I guess you just have to accept uncertainty (which is so frequently said but so important). If life really is just a crazy paradox of weird shit, so be it. It doesn’t affect you unless you let it. Just live in the moment and try to shrink your widening mind to the simple stuff. It’s a little naive but it worked for me!

I get you. Like you know what you NEED to think but it’s hard to actually believe it. But I promise you, you’ll get there. When I had it, I had no idea what OCD was so it was a strange part of my life. And I didn’t think I’d get out of it but I did, and so will you :)

You might be experiencing derelazaion and depersonalization along with exsistenital ocd

I COMPLETELY UNDERSTAND THIS. I’ve been dealing with these thoughts for a lil bit and it’s terrifying but your not alone ?it’s okay to have these thoughts and that’s what they are... just thoughts, not real. Reality is reality( and even though we both probably don’t understand that lol) we just gotta live it. IK how hard it is tho. Makes you wanna curl up in a ball and just cry, and IK it’s easier said than done but if you do something active like go for a walk or watch a comedy show it might help get your mind off it. Much love <3

Thank you, Eden!! I guess suffering from derealization doesn’t help hahaha I need to remind myself that OCD is lying to me, as it does with everything. I don’t need to understand reality, I just have to live (it’s so hard to believe this)

Thank you so much!!!! You guys are so nice. And yes, I suffer from derealization since I was a child, @moeg!