- Date posted
- 6y
- Date posted
- 6y
Yep I know exactly how you feel. I remember one night in July last year, I sat on my bed and just thought so much about life and how weird it is and I got so much anxiety. Even just going downstairs later that night felt off. And the thing about repeating a word until it loses its meaning is so true in relation to existential OCD! I guess you just have to accept uncertainty (which is so frequently said but so important). If life really is just a crazy paradox of weird shit, so be it. It doesn’t affect you unless you let it. Just live in the moment and try to shrink your widening mind to the simple stuff. It’s a little naive but it worked for me!
- Date posted
- 6y
I get you. Like you know what you NEED to think but it’s hard to actually believe it. But I promise you, you’ll get there. When I had it, I had no idea what OCD was so it was a strange part of my life. And I didn’t think I’d get out of it but I did, and so will you :)
- Date posted
- 6y
You might be experiencing derelazaion and depersonalization along with exsistenital ocd
- Date posted
- 6y
I COMPLETELY UNDERSTAND THIS. I’ve been dealing with these thoughts for a lil bit and it’s terrifying but your not alone ?it’s okay to have these thoughts and that’s what they are... just thoughts, not real. Reality is reality( and even though we both probably don’t understand that lol) we just gotta live it. IK how hard it is tho. Makes you wanna curl up in a ball and just cry, and IK it’s easier said than done but if you do something active like go for a walk or watch a comedy show it might help get your mind off it. Much love <3
- Date posted
- 6y
Thank you, Eden!! I guess suffering from derealization doesn’t help hahaha I need to remind myself that OCD is lying to me, as it does with everything. I don’t need to understand reality, I just have to live (it’s so hard to believe this)
- Date posted
- 6y
Thank you so much!!!! You guys are so nice. And yes, I suffer from derealization since I was a child, @moeg!
Related posts
- Date posted
- 20w
i’ve just been feeling so off lately. i’m okay right now, but a couple hours ago i was in this mood where i felt anxiety creeping up. like i will feel like there’s danger when there isn’t. i just get this really uncomfortable feeling that something feels wrong even when it isn’t. and i’ve been feeling derealization/depersonalization. just really disconnected from myself and the world. i’ve also been unmotivated to where there are times when the thought of doing things upsets me. and i’ve been having existential thoughts that do not mesh well with harm ocd. i get the thought “if people aren’t real then it’s okay to hurt them”. it sucks because there are times where i just don’t even care to ruminate and find reassurance that that’s not the case. furthermore, i’ve just been really aware of my existence. i will get moments where i’m so aware of my existence and it freaks me out. like the fact that i’m a living human being is crazy to me. then there are times when i’m not even anxious about anything which then has me questioning and ruminating on that because i ALWAYS have something i’m worrying about. i’ve also been feeling really nostalgic and bittersweet of the good memories from the past. i keep thinking about good times i’ve had and really wishing i could relive it. for example, last summer was a pretty good summer even with my ocd. and i just wish i could relive some of those moments, but i obviously can’t. and it’s been upsetting me because this month has been shitty with my anxiety. as for an update with my room change to those of you curious, i still have anxiety over it and my mom is taking it as me being ungrateful with what i have when it’s my ocd making a huge deal of it. that upsets me especially since i’ve told her what’s been going on and she was really understanding of it. anyways, life has just been a bit much and i’ve been dealing with more to my anxiety that i don’t appreciate. while worrying about constantly throwing up with my contamination ocd is incredibly exhausting, it’s so normal to me that i’m used to it. but when my harm ocd kicks in along with other themes that aren’t usually common for me, i freak out and feel like i’m going insane. i genuinely wonder how people have dealt with taboo topics of ocd without treatment for years on end. i’ve had harm intrusive thoughts since i was little, but it didn’t get to any extreme until 2023. i feel like i’m drowning in it when it decides to hit me and the thought of having to deal with it for the rest of my life?? i’m scared something in me will flip and i’ll become what my thoughts are telling me i am. i apologize for the mixed thoughts that are all over the place but i feel safe posting on here about it and want to hear how y’all are doing
- Date posted
- 9w
Everyday I wake up with a pit in my stomach and it doesn’t go away. I question reality and if anything is real. How it’s real and why it’s real? Everyday I wake up I’m disappointed I don’t have answers to life. By answers I mean the afterlife (if there is one) I find it hard to accept someday our life ends. It makes me wonder if life even has a point. It consumes me everyday and I can’t function normally. I wonder what I’ll do when my family members pass and where they’ll go. If I’ll ever see them again. I cry every night because I genuinely don’t know how I’ll handle that one day. I’m deeply afraid of losing the people I love and never seeing them again. Overall, I question everything about life. There’s so I don’t know and I know I can’t find the answer and that devastates me. I truly wonder how I got here and why I was chosen to be here. It freaks me out. I try to find solutions. For example, I consider myself agnostic. And I would like there to be a God but it’s difficult for me to believe it without evidence. What if it’s not real? And there’s so many things out there. I wonder if reincarnation is real or if it’s just something us humans made up for comfort. I’m working on my relationship with God but I don’t know. I feel guilty because I feel like I’m only doing it because I’m afraid.
- Date posted
- 9w
Im easily scared so please be gentle. My ocd lately has been stuck on “how are we even here?” “What if this is fake” “how are we in a globe”. Super weird questions that I can’t answer or get my thoughts off of it. Anyone else out there with the same? I haven’t found a lot of people with existential ocd.
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